I could hear the rain pouring down rhythmically. I reached out through the window, letting the droplets touch my bare hands. The water started slipping through my fingers, a poignant reminder of all the opportunities that slipped away like rainwater, lost to my grief.

How could I let myself miss those things? How could I be so careless? The thoughts started whirling around my head.

“Not again,” I told myself as I stood up to make myself a cup of tea. I haven’t had tea in weeks now because I barely had any energy to do anything. Pending assignments and office work have piled up on my study table since last week.

I had been so consumed by my grief that everything else had blurred out. I couldn’t really process the death of my pet cat, Misty. The finest white Persian cat with blue eyes, indeed one of a kind. I lost her to some kind of infection she developed last month, and even the vet couldn’t diagnose her properly. I sighed while I turned on the stove and placed the saucepan filled with water for tea to boil.

Lost in my thoughts again, I stumbled upon the missed opportunity of applying for a scholarship in the States. Grief is often followed by regret and while I grieved for losing my pet, I regret grieving and missing a lifetime opportunity. I was in an endless cycle of sadness.

I heard the water boiling as the bubbles formed in the saucepan. I added a little milk and tea leaves. The aroma of tea had some calming effect as the unrest in my heart started settling.

“I can’t punish myself for grieving,” I thought to myself as I poured tea into my cup.

It’s true life doesn’t stop or wait for you to get over your sadness. I can’t fix everything today, but at least I can start little by little. As I took sips from my tea, I gathered my courage.

Then, just as I set the cup down on the kitchen counter, I heard a soft meow. My heart skipped a beat.

“Misty?” I called out as I followed the sound. It was coming from the driveway. I don’t know why I called out her name, knowing fully well that she wasn’t alive.

The rain had slowed down but it was still chilly outside. As I searched out in the driveway, I saw a kitten under my car, probably cold and scared of the rain. The kitten was shivering and looked at me helplessly. I took her inside, where I wrapped her in a soft towel. It wasn’t Misty but somehow, I still felt love for it.

Perhaps, life might take away some things from you, but it has a way of surprising you in other ways.

Published in Dawn, Young World, April 26th, 2025