Hi Auntie,

I am 15 years old and live with my single mother, grandparents and younger sister (my father was abusive). I have my O-levels exam in a week or two. I have been consistently depressed, especially over the last month. I cry many times in a single day and I feel hopeless and completely alone. I have horrible mood swings and nightmares.

Every bad grade, slight embarrassment in public, bad day, fight with my family, leaves me so upset, I feel unable to move on and I continually replay moments in my head. I am unable to sleep, eat or study. I have thoughts about harming myself and I feel completely alone in the world.

I am extremely insecure about how I will be perceived by others and have lost friends due to my anxious attachment style, where I constantly text people because I am scared that they hate me because of miscommunication. I feel impossibly lonely as, even though it appears like I have many friends, none of them truly value me and I have to act fake to get them to like me.

I don’t feel comfortable talking to people about my feelings in person. I have crippling social anxiety and people get visibly repulsed by me when talking to me due to my complete lack of social skills. I hate myself and I wish I were anyone else. I find it really hard to settle in new environments and am unable to move on from anything or be productive. Please help me as I want to do well in my exams.

‘I Have Crippling Social Anxiety’

Burnt Out and Constantly Anxious

Dear Burnt Out and Constantly Anxious,

It sounds like you are exhausted — not just because of your exams, but also from what has been going on inside you for far too long.

Please understand that the crying, the overthinking, the feeling that every small thing becomes huge, and the thought that people secretly dislike you is your anxiety at work. It is not real. Unfortunately, the anxiety takes normal, everyday situations and makes them unbearable.

Remind yourself that you absolutely don’t have to fix your entire life. Nobody knows what is going to happen in the future, so you need to focus on getting through the next few weeks. And while you think about that, be gentle with yourself.

For your exams, keep your study schedule simple. Don’t aim for perfection. Just aim to do your best. Sit down, pick one small topic, study it for 20–25 minutes, then take a short break. Then repeat with another topic. Whenever you feel like your mind is starting to overthink, bring it back to the page. It won’t always be easy, but it is necessary. Do it anyway — and try not to punish yourself when it feels hard.

As for how you are feeling socially, the fact is that people are not as focused on you as you think they are. The feeling that “they’re repulsed by me” may feel real, but it’s coming from how harshly you are judging yourself right now. Remember that you’re not fake or unlikeable. The more important thing is to focus on how you see yourself and stop trying too hard to not be rejected. Be kind to yourself.

Also, you need to find at least one person who knows that you are struggling. It could be your mother, a teacher, a counsellor. You don’t have to explain everything to them — just start by telling them that you are not okay.

If the thoughts about harming yourself get stronger, please tell someone immediately. That is more important than any exam.

Disclaimer: If you or someone you know is in crisis and/or feeling suicidal, please go to your nearest emergency room and seek medical help immediately.

Auntie will not reply privately to any query. Please send concise queries to: auntieagni@gmail.com

Published in Dawn, EOS, April 26th, 2026