Advice: Say ‘No’, be yourself!

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We all are well aware of the problems we have experienced or might currently be facing in our lives. Do you know what is the biggest mistake we usually make? It is when we say ‘yes’ to most of the things where we actually have to say ‘no’.

Do we even realise why this is so? It happens as we present ourselves to be so humble and obedient before others that they begin to take undue advantage of our nature, and gradually we get used to it.

So what’s the point of being afraid? Saying ‘no’ nicely to the things you’re not interested in is far better than giving a brief explanation. ‘No’ can be a complete sentence. For many of us, saying ‘no’ can be hard, assuming that it might be awkward, and yet we blurt out a ‘yes’ happily.

However, deep down, in reality, we feel just the opposite of it, which is the worst thing we do with our mental health, because by saying yes, we oblige to others’ demands, whatever they may be. Suppose your friend has asked you to lend him/her your favourite dress for a weekend party (you love your dress and are too possessive about it), but you think saying a ‘no’ would look rude. So, unwillingly, you say a yes and after handing over the dress, you regret it the whole time until you get it back.

The situation could have been positively altered if you had simply said a ‘no’. If you don’t want to look rude, just give a humble excuse for not lending it.

Why do we let people and circumstances control our life, moods and state of mind? We can always refuse to yield to them. Things or tasks which make us uncomfortable should be eliminated from our lives. Before doling out ‘yes’ to anyone, ask yourself if this will make you even more burnt out. Will saying ‘yes’ be good for my mental health, or will it worsen my situation?

If you can overcome these questions, then it will become easy for you to manage and act accordingly. Present yourself with confidence. Once you start believing in yourself, you can easily pull off pretty much anything. It simply means you need to bring more of yourself into whatever you intend to focus on to the best of your ability.

Published in Dawn, Young World, August 21st, 2021

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