Bakra Eid is way less dramatic than the previous Eid, thanks to the absence of the large-sized moon sighting tantrums that our provincial governments throw every year. In a lot of ways, it is more peaceful and less overwhelming too, for there is less pressure on the earning members of the family on the eidi front. Especially at the rate at which relatives multiply, by the time the youngest receives their due share, the Eidi Santa is borrowing money from the kid's parents to be able to afford a decent goat for the occasion — one that doesn't get mistaken for a balding, vitilogo affected poodle. In a nutshell, Bakra Eid is a humbling affair, until we go chop, chop, chop!

Even those who snooze through meethi Eid, end up rising and shining on this one, partly to make their sacrifices, and partly because they can't take the mad cow in the car porch going Puff Daddy on them anymore. Even though personally, I find cows to be gentle giants of sorts, and rather mellow as compared to their goaty counterparts, I am sure there will be thousands of insomniacs who would completely disagree with me.

As for the goats, they are altogether a different ball game (pun intended). Though most families avoid bringing them home till the night before Eid; quite the majority also get blackmailed into getting them weeks before to keep the children of the house happy, and at times distracted. Even though they miss out on a good night's sleep from there on end, they can at least save on their already scant hair that their children pull out by the dozens every time they get a piggyback ride across the apartment. The fathers can stand the goats singing bye, bye Miss American pie in chorus, getting louder by the night, for there are few joys as serene as being able to read a newspaper without junior going scare-tactics on it, or sitting on the loo without chotu doing peek-a-boo (that rhymed!).

Come to think of it, Bakra Eid is also easy on the pockets for many. One doesn't need a Ismail Fareed sizzler to sacrifice a goat. The old vest that has been used as vest, duster, pamper and vest again does just fine. Also for the ladies, the number of dresses goes down to a 'very few', for there's no way they're flaunting their designer numbers to the dead goats they have to fit in the freezer — head, legs, organs and all — especially after finding their Cashmere cardigan on a man-goat first thing on Eid morning.

But Bakra Eid is something little ones especially look forward to all year, and also something they get nightmares about for the rest of their lives. But as far as the animals are concerned, it is their first chance of truly owning something and getting to keep it for a while without Mama saying 'let's save it for graduation'. This is why goats are to little boys what Barbies are to little girls, they give them a taste of what it will be like to be a man, until the time of sacrifice approaches, and they scream like little girls and hide under the bed with the Barbies. What irony.

Along with all its joys and festivities, Bakra Eid is also a time of year when foreigners should avoid travelling South, unless they have fought in the war on terror, and PETA should plan an all-staff-and-activist hike to Mount Everest, for the roads and lanes paint too rosy a picture for them to swallow, literally.

But humour aside, this Eid has a lot more to offer and teach than we take and learn from it. So how about you try this instead of forcing the already horrified junior and the bunch to watch a camel being sacrificed down the road, which mind you may permanently mess up his sensitivity scale, try and sit them down and tell them a word or two about sacrifice. Or you could ask them to give away something very dear to them away this year, for that is what this Eid stands for in the first place. The knives can come in later.