Jambo Kenya!

Published November 24, 2013
Postcard perfect beach.
Postcard perfect beach.
Out in the wilderness.
Out in the wilderness.
Enjoying a meal.
Enjoying a meal.

I usually do not like to visit a country twice, but Kenya was an exception. Ever since I saw Out of Africa, in 1985, a film that is about a colonialist perspective on living in the heart of Africa, I was mesmerised with the idea of reliving that experience. And how true it was when I finally had the chance; Kenya is nothing like the ‘deserts and barbarians’ African stereotype that a typical Pakistani holds. Verdant, heavenly climate, courteous people, spectacular beaches and, of course, the ultimate safari experience are what Kenya is all about.

I went there first in September 2011 with my mother and aunt, who share my penchant for wildlife and relative dislike for soulless shopping trips such as Dubai, and then again a few months back with my wife and daughter. The moment we stepped out from the airport terminal building, we were gently embraced by 12°C winds (just the perfect start).

However, be warned, we still broke out a sweat once we ventured out on the main roads; Kenya is still an impoverished country with abysmal infrastructure, which makes Pakistan look like America. There are streets which can hardly be called highways, and traffic jams can last for hours. The city centre and most hotels are at least one hour away from the airport, so make sure you have your ipad charged and ready in the taxi cab to kill time. Kenya also has a problem with hotels. Either they are extremely good (like Ole Safari, Serena, and Kempinski which start at $400 per night) or they are really bad, like the one we stayed in, with mosquitos the size of hummingbirds, and surrounded by a ghetto (not to forget the area around it is also frequented by wild boars). There is hardly any middle ground. We also enjoyed the notoriety of staying close to one of the most popular restaurants in Nairobi, called the ‘Carnivore’, which specialises in serving big game meat (chimps, zebras, giraffes and Impala, etc). We hardly ventured close to it!

Nairobi is also one of the most unique cities in the world, graced as it is by a huge safari park right in the middle of the city. It’s an amazing experience indeed; imagine looking at statuesque giraffes and buffalos roaming in the park right from your office windows. There are no words to describe it. The Nairobi national park is ideal for those who don’t want to go through the travails of travelling hours to one of the bigger games reserves such as Tsavo, Masai Mara, etc. and want to save up on Safari expenses. The Kenya Wildlife service charges heavily for foreigners as compared to locals and, unfortunately, $125 per person may not seem much for a European or American tourist, but it sure is a hefty sum for a typical Pakistani family of 5-7. And one must not try to bribe himself out of the park entry fee either, as Kenyans defend their biggest source of earnings viciously.

They will even check the age of children in the passport to ensure that no one gets a free ride. With their entire GDP of $35bn (compared to Pakistan’s $500bn) based on tourism, tea, roses and coffee, there is no room for corruption. Speaking of roses, one may not be aware that the beautiful Kenyan highlands’ climate (10-24°C all year round) is perfectly conducive for growing stunning long stem roses, so much so the majority of roses being sold in Europe are in fact of Kenyan origin.

However, we Pakistanis are masters in getting a good deal, and my instincts helped me well. Instead of going through a professional safari service, we found contacts through a taxi driver (Kenyans love to help each other out, and in a few minutes, I had struck a deal with the cousin of the taxi driver who picked us up from the airport!). These taxis took us to the safari at our discretion instead of tagging along with geriatric European vacationers, who just would not stop complaining about everything. One thing to remember: haggle or die. Spoiled by the constant inflow of rich tourists who sometimes pay up to $3,000 per person for a safari, the operators always inflate their fee. Start from half and proceed upwards if necessary (much like you would do in Thailand). Don’t expect to spend too much on food, as apparently the only thing that Kenyans eat are French fries and bland chicken. There are NO noteworthy malls or fast food restaurants (KFC just barely opened and it’s too expensive even for us), and Kenyans do not believe in using salt in their food. I had to carry a bottle of tabasco sauce throughout my trip to suit my desi palate.

One more thing that is in stark contrast with Pakistan is the willingness of people to walk. You will see thousands of people walking on the streets out of choice rather than necessity. This may be because Kenya is very safe and the weather actually makes you enjoy the jaunts. They do have vans, called Matatas (Hakuna Matata?), which drive at supersonic speeds, but they are cramped and suited for the more lean and mean Kenyans rather than us stocky Pakistanis. One point to mention: Kenyans always win the Olympics in long distance marathons. They are that fit and that used to running at high altitudes.

It’s a sad predicament, but the first time I visited Kenya, our exchange rates were at par (1$=86 Kenyan shillings/Pak rupees). This time around, our Rs100 were equal to only KES85 and everything seemed more expensive. We also had another rude surprise when we arrived in Kenya; the airport had burned down completely and we had to be processed under tents. Apparently, it was sabotage and someone had intentionally set the airport on fire after his contract was rejected. Despite the daunting experience of sitting in the cold under flimsy tents, I was still surprised to see thousands of tourists lining up to enter Kenya.

Going to a safari is an experience of a lifetime. No matter how many documentaries you see, you are still awed by seeing it with your own eyes. Looking at the animals in their natural habitat is nothing compared to watching them in a zoo, or for the sake of comparison, seeing the drugged animals in the night safari in Singapore.

We went to the Lake Nakuru national park both times but were not able to see many animals in the latter trip because the lake had flooded. Masai Mara is a full day’s drive from where we were staying and is not recommended for older people or kids because of the derelict condition of the roads. Of course, there is the option of flying there or hiring a hot air balloon, but they are exorbitantly priced and suitable only for the super-rich.

Our trip to the must-visit city of Mombasa was much more enjoyable due to the warmer weather, beautiful hotels, and mind blowing views of the sea. It’s a typical white sand azure coloured beach you see in postcards around the world, and the real thing cannot be described in a narrative. One could lie on the beach chair all day long just idling and savoring the breeze under the swaying coconut trees, and occasionally shooing off the intrusive monkeys who come to steal your food.

I recently read in the newspapers that a huge water aquifer has been discovered under Kenya, which will transform the entire country to lush green landscape. Ironically, when the British colonists left Kenya, they had only given a few years for the wildlife to be wiped out by the natives. How wrong they were. Not only is wildlife thriving there, but things seem to be getting better and better for Kenya and the Kenyan people! Jambo Kenya!

Opinion

Editorial

Judiciary’s SOS
Updated 28 Mar, 2024

Judiciary’s SOS

The ball is now in CJP Isa’s court, and he will feel pressure to take action.
Data protection
28 Mar, 2024

Data protection

WHAT do we want? Data protection laws. When do we want them? Immediately. Without delay, if we are to prevent ...
Selling humans
28 Mar, 2024

Selling humans

HUMAN traders feed off economic distress; they peddle promises of a better life to the impoverished who, mired in...
New terror wave
Updated 27 Mar, 2024

New terror wave

The time has come for decisive government action against militancy.
Development costs
27 Mar, 2024

Development costs

A HEFTY escalation of 30pc in the cost of ongoing federal development schemes is one of the many decisions where the...
Aitchison controversy
Updated 27 Mar, 2024

Aitchison controversy

It is hoped that higher authorities realise that politics and nepotism have no place in schools.