EACH year, on Nov 11, the Chinese celebrate Singles Day — a tongue-in-cheek counterpoint to Valentine’s Day and its glorification of coupledom. The students who came up with it chose 11/11 as the date because it looks like a bunch of sticks — single people in Chinese slang. In commercial terms, the holiday grosses over $200 billion in consumer spending as there are special sales and products created to celebrate single people. This number is greater than Amazon Prime Day or Black Friday sales in the US combined.
It makes sense for the Chinese to celebrate the day. The one-child policy that was in effect in China between 1979 and 2015 triggered sex-selective abortions — parents preferred to have boys. This contributed to skewed population numbers, with more males than females. In addition, increasing opportunities for women mean that millions have no interest in choosing a traditional marriage. The number of people celebrating Singles Day also reveals how economically powerful these women are. The trend extends beyond China. In South Korea, for instance, 36 per cent of all households are now single-person households.
The rise of ‘singledom’ is not limited to East Asia. In Iran, marriage rates have been plummeting also. Statistics show that the number of marriages has fallen from 800,000 to 480,000 over the past decade. This shift suggests that staying single is becoming increasing acceptable in Iran as well. According to one woman interviewed by the Financial Times, “People in my social circle keep telling me it’s not worth giving up my freedom to get married, and they encourage me to continue living happily single.” This sort of advice runs counter to the usual exhortations from family members to get married and settled. But rather than marrying, many choose to stay single.
A professor at Tehran University told the FT that 5pc of women under 40 in Iran were unlikely to be married “up from only 2pc in the 1980s”. The average age of marriage in Iran has also increased for men and women. This societal aversion to marriage has troubled the religious authorities who blame the shift on the influence of Western values. Social media is also blamed for showing the young and single living carefree lives, creating an impression that marriage is a sort of prison. Many Iranian women might agree as they need their husbands’ permission to travel abroad.
The idea of staying single is becoming increasingly acceptable.
Another Muslim country that is seeing a similar rise in single people is Turkiye where marriage rates have fallen considerably over the past couple of decades. Young Turkish women are not interested in accepting the strictures that come with family life because it often means abandoning their own dreams of a career and a life of freedom. Increasing levels of education among women — both those who are religiously observant and others who are not — mean that they have their own views on the life they want for themselves, even if it means remaining single.
These examples are very relevant to the experiences of Pakistani women. It seems that the number of Pakistani women who are single is growing. The reasons are varied; some are unable to find a suitable candidate to match their education level or values; others are taking care of elderly parents both physically and financially; still others have demanding business and work commitments. As bad marriages have become such a staple of the cultural conversation, with many television serials dedicated to exposing just how society traps women, it is only natural that many younger women are wary of marriage. For men, the challenges include finding stable employment and housing in an economy that is in shambles.
More single women mean more women living by themselves. Unli-ke Iran and Turkiye where women are easily able to rent apartments and houses for themselves, finding a place to live as a single woman is still an uphill battle in Pakistan. Single women looking to rent face intrusive questions from landlords who regard their decision to live alone with suspicion. If rentals are procured there is still the matter of nosy neighbours who see the single woman as an object of curiosity and a target for judgement.
As society transforms itself — with connections becoming virtual and AI-created bots emerging as companions — marriage as an institution may face significant strain. Many ask what is the use of a real-life companion when virtual friendships are available on your phone or if AI has created your dream partner to talk to. ‘Singledom’ is here to stay and possibly increase. This Nov 11, we, too, should perhaps consider celebrating Singles Day as a step into the world of our future.
The writer is an attorney teaching constitutional law and political philosophy.
Published in Dawn, June 6th, 2026
