ADVICE: AUNTIE AGNI

Published November 24, 2019

Hi Auntie,

I am a 16-year-old boy. I am currently studying in O-levels and preparing for next year’s papers. Due to my not-so-good result last year, my mom is urging me to study harder for the upcoming examinations.

I am doing as she says, but I have a habit of using my cell phone compulsively. Sometimes I am so distracted that even when I make up my mind to study and turn off my phone, I keep thinking about it and everything seems messed up. Sometimes I study really well without getting distracted, but most of the time I am unable to concentrate.

I don’t watch or do anything inappropriate on the phone. Mostly I just scroll through social media platforms, surf YouTube for entertainment and ocassionally chat with friends. I want to end this addiction not only to focus on my academics, there are also other minor reasons. I am unable to concentrate on routine aspects of my daily life. At times I get a bit stressed also. I rarely use the phone productively, such as watching informative documentaries or doing research, which is why I want to kick this habit. Please help me!

Phone Addict

Hello Beta,

Let me first congratulate you for identifying your problem. You know that the problem is not really your cell phone — it is your addiction to it. So very quickly, I want to ask you a few questions and draw your attention to a few things. I say quickly because I don’t want to distract you too much from your studies.

At this point the biggest illusion you have in your mind is that you have time. You don’t. Every day counts and you should be making the most of every single day.

Let’s also explore your motive for getting the grades. Why do you want the grades? Is it to see your mom’s excitement after it? Or is there something else that makes you want the excellent grades? What about how proud you will feel when you get good grades? Think about that and make it your goal. Be very clear. You are doing this because you want to be proud of yourself and get into the college of your choice and prove to your parents that you rock!

Once that is in place, take some time to remind yourself for a few minutes every day that you will be successful. To borrow a quote from Yoda in Star Wars, “There is do or do not.

There is no try.” Now get down to the actual work of studying.

I cannot emphasise this enough. If you want to succeed at your studies you will have to get down and do the hard work. Once you have motivated yourself, leave your phone outside the room in which you study. There is nothing important on your phone. Know that the world will continue to turn even if you aren’t surfing away on your phone.

It would help if you make your study room as comfortable as possible. If you study better at the desk or on your bed, just take your books there. Do you prefer quiet, the noise of the fan or music? The idea is to make your study environment as close to your liking as quickly as possible.

Study in short intervals that suit you. You will have an idea of when your concentration starts to wear off. Decide whether short study intervals of 20 or 30 minutes suit you and focus accordingly. Make a timetable and sit down to study every single day.

Hope this helps. Best of luck!

Auntie will not reply privately to any query. Please send concise queries to: auntieagni@gmail.com

Published in Dawn, EOS, November 24th, 2019

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