Different by nature, connected by blood, there is something special about the sibling relationship in a family. The connection is hard to describe, yet when sitting in the same room with your brother or sister, there is a palpable feeling of being linked, of knowing each other deeply, and of being the combined strength of your parents under one roof. Isn’t it incredible that even though one of you may be bossy and the other submissive, one wicked and the other a reflection of pure innocence, the very connection makes your bond so resilient, that it survives through everything and gets stronger as time goes by. Yes, this is the special connection between siblings, even when they are miles away or are different from each other.

The sibling bond is a comfort for it knows no boundaries of mere words. Both brothers and sisters bring their kind of support and comfort to each other. For example, a brother might be good at making you laugh when you’re feeling down, while a sister might be great at listening and giving advice just like a mother cum friend. They each have their unique ways of being there for you when you need them.

There may be times when all you need is a good scolding from your big brother to set things right, and then comes the warm hug from your big sister to make everything feel better again. Or maybe your younger sister/brother comes and offers you candy to cheer you up in their sweet way!

Those of you who have older or younger siblings would agree that siblings provide companionship and support, often as our playmates, and guides. They also serve as role models and sources of influence, shaping our attitudes, behaviours, and beliefs.

However, sibling relationships are not always harmonious. Rivalry and competition are common, especially in childhood, when you struggle to get attention and parents’ approval. Sometimes these arguments continue even when you’re grown up, but it’s when you understand each other better things also come to normal.

Despite occasional disagreements, siblings usually share a unique bond characterised by love, loyalty and shared family history. Just like no one can replace parents in our lives, siblings own the same special place in our lives. Having siblings whether younger or older means you have someone to share everything with, every step of the way. From playing games to going to school and celebrating birthdays, you do it all together under one roof.

Of course, there might be times when you disagree or argue, like over who gets the last cookie or who’s going to hold the remote control of the TV.

During all this time, there may come a point when you or your siblings feel like each other’s worst enemy. You might even start to dislike the thought of one another and prefer spending time with friends instead. But hey, it’s normal. We fight, we love, we stop talking, and we might ignore each other because of disagreements. But deep down, you know that your sibling shares the same blood and DNA as you do, and that explains it all, the bond can’t easily be broken.

Brother to brother

If you are a brother, and have a brother, whether younger or older, it’s usually like having a partner in crime for life. At first, your older brother may be demanding and bossy, but eventually, he will start interfering so much that you may feel suffocated. But don’t worry, kiddo, it’s just the way males are wired. It’s his way of looking out for you. With time, he will change, and you’ll also learn how to deal with him.

However, if he’s younger, you’ve got this knack for asserting your authority and making sure he listens to you, right? But beyond just flexing your big-sibling muscles, there’s this bond that tugs at your heartstrings, making you think about your little one more often. You feel this sense of responsibility towards him, as a special part of your life that you can’t forget. So, there may be times when a father figure from within you suddenly emerges, especially when you see him in a fight; you jump into the situation like a protective hulk to defend your little buddy. Your priority becomes is giving your brother a haven under your umbrella. Isn’t it?

Brothers often have a different, yet unique way of conveying their message to each other. Sometimes it’s through teasing and joking, other times it’s through giving a silent look that says it all. No matter how tough things get between you two, your brother cannot stop thinking and being protective of you, he just has his stubborn ways.

Big brothers teach you valuable lessons about teamwork, support and standing up for each other. You learn to navigate the ups and downs of life together, as your brother also acts as a mentor and your guide.

However, being both males, there is an innate trait of stubbornness in your nature and of course, there’s no denying this fact. Consequently, it’s not uncommon for you to engage in occasional fights or arguments. But at the end of the day, you know you are connected.

Sister to sister

If you are a girl and have a sister, you will agree that having a sister is like having a best friend under one roof in many cases. A sister is someone you can laugh, cry and share your deepest secrets with. Sisters also share a unique bond that’s unlike any other relationship. There is no denying that whether you are younger or older, you grow up together, sharing clothes, makeup tips, inside jokes and sometimes envy, but for the time being.

Girls who have a younger sister will agree that there comes a time when their innate motherly nature will come out to protect, scold and have eagle eyes on their younger sis. Ask yourself, don’t you take responsibility for your sister without being told and that may be the point of squabbling like cats and dogs or laughing like best friends depending on the situation. But yes, even then sisters bring out the best and worst in each other, they can be enemies at times, and can be the one angel in disguise in parents’ eyes.

Having a big sister gives you immense support, but she may also tease you mercilessly because it’s her way of teaching you a lesson. However, it doesn’t mean she cares any less, she has vigilant eyes and is always observing you so that she can take charge of the situation when you need her the most. Big sisters try to guide you through life’s ups and downs with wisdom gained from their own experiences.

Brother and sister

So when one of you is a sister and the other a brother, it is like two contrasting worlds colliding in conflict. Sisters and brothers typically have different perspectives, interests, and ways of approaching life which is natural due to their gender; therefore, this natural divergence leads to misunderstandings, disagreements, or even heated arguments. Sisters may prefer communication and emotional expression, while brothers might lean towards problem-solving and action-oriented approaches.

Exceptions apart, a sister with a big brother is often confident that her brother will give in to her argument and teasing, knowing that he will still support her. Younger sisters to their brothers are pampered or, in other words spoilt, while older sisters usually act like second mums, assisting and taking care of their younger siblings just like their mum.

Siblings play a multifaceted role in our lives from whom we learn the art of understanding the world. Whether it is only brothers, only sisters, or brothers and sisters, the bond between siblings is unique and special. It’s a bond that defies distance and time because it is built on love, laughter, and shared experiences, and it lasts a lifetime Therefore, regardless of how far apart siblings may live, or how different they choose their paths to walk on, there is a shared history and a shared understanding that can never be replaced or taken by any other relationship.

Dear friends, April 10th is celebrated as Siblings Day, and it’s round the corner, forgive and forget all the clashes that you have with your sister or brother, and cherish his/her presence in your life.

Published in Dawn, Young World, April 6th, 2024