KARACHI: Growing incidents of sexual assault by men, who prey on unsuspecting women through matchmaking apps, show that despite having verification checks and safety features, matchmaking applications and websites are becoming a hunting ground for predators.

Matrimonial and friendship apps have gained attention in recent years in the country as a large number of ‘singles’ are registering on such applications in search of serious relationships or to find an ideal match for marriage.

A number of such apps, such as Dil Ka Rishta and Muzz, have carried out rigorous marketing campaigns in the recent past.

But while there were a number of success stories shared by women on multiple social media platforms about how they had a good experience on the app and found their partners there, not everyone is so lucky.

“He tried to force me, and when I firmly said no, he tried to pin down me physically. It was horrible, I still go through the horrendous flashbacks of that day,” said Nadia*, sharing her experience of meeting someone in person after she signed up on a matrimonial app to look for a marriage proposal.

Women relate stories of sexual assault, harassment at hands of ‘predators’ using matrimonial apps

The 26-year-old said she did not want to go through the traditional rishta process, and signed up on the Salams app in February.

“I heard reviews from my friends, and they told me it was a safe space where you could meet like-minded people. I created a profile – but even then I was reticent because I feared my photos could be misused. My fears were not unfounded, but rather than my photos, it was I who was harassed and attacked,” she said.

Nadia told Dawn she “swiped” on a man who seemed interesting, and they got to talking.

“After a few conversations, we decided to meet. Our first meeting went well, and I was insistent that we tell our parents. He asked for some more time, but I shared the news with my parents,” she said.

According to her, the young man in question asked to meet her at a café in Karachi around 11am in March, saying that he had planned something ‘special’ in order to propose to her.

“We had breakfast, and he got me flowers. I was very happy since I could see this going somewhere. He asked if we could go to Seaview and I said yes. While we were driving to the spot, he started to touch me inappropriately. I tried to stop him politely but he did not. Instead, he started calling me names, and threatened to even kill me,” she added.

“He tried to pin me down on the passenger seat. Luckily, he couldn’t because I started screaming, and that’s when some people passing noticed the commotion, which scared him. The moment he got his hands off me, I got out of the car and ran away as fast as I could. I managed to reach the nearest transport stand. Thankfully, he did not follow me,” she said.

Like Nadia, 24-year-old Sharmeen* also tried to find herself a suitable partner on another matrimonial app, only to be met with a similar misfortune.

“At first sight, I found him to be a promising prospect. He was charming, soft and an upright man whose moral values matched mine. So, I decided to meet him,” she said.

“We met at a coffee shop, and he asked me to come home with him, because he wanted me to meet his parents. When we got there, there was no one home. Sensing trouble, I asked him to drop me back,” she narrated.

Sharmeen claimed the man then tried to sexually assault her. “When I threatened to file a police report on him, he stopped and allowed me to leave,” she said, breaking down into tears while recalling the traumatic experience.

Enhancing app safety

Although the operators of matrimonial apps cannot be held responsible for the acts of individuals, most such applications boast of a number of safety features.

User profiles are supposed to be verified and warnings to not share personal info with people you don’t know are prominently featured.

Dawn reached out to an number of matrimonial apps to inquire about their security policies. A representative of Salams explained their cyber security policy.

“We keep an eye on sign-ups and our system has been developed in a way that spam profiles are deleted. However, due to the popularity of the app, the [number of] sign-ups has increased in the last three years, due to which screening has become a challenge. But, our cyber security system is currently building a better screening system, which we’ll hopefully be implementing shortly,” a spokesperson for Salams told Dawn.

Call for better screening system

Nighat Dad, chairperson of the Digital Rights Foundation (DRF), also works actively to eradicate cyber harassment and provide support for victims. She emphasises the need for building a better screening system for the people who sign up on these apps.

“With the rise of spaces to exchange data, the rate of exploitative and criminal behaviour has also become very commonplace now and is something we encounter through the calls received on our Cyber Harassment Helpline. Companies like the dating apps in question need to employ more robust user safety mechanisms to curtail this growth,” she said.

In her view, the vetting system for profiles needs to be thorough, weeding out users with multiple accounts or those creating inauthentic accounts. Additionally, apps can highlight the laws of the jurisdiction they are operating in and penalise online and physical harassment, as a deterrent, she added.

There is also international precedent. In 2021, ABC News reported that Australian women were being subjected to sexual violence at the hands of men they matched with on dating app Tinder. When the victims started taking their complaints to the authorities, Tinder was forced to introduce ‘verified profiles’ and develop a sexual harassment policy.

In cases of the two Pakistani women mentioned earlier, the only action taken was that the offenders’ accounts were blocked after the victims lodged complaints with the app. However, since no legal action was pursued, they remain at large.

Experts believe that such apps can be made more secure by employing facial recognition features and tracking tools, which can help trace the location of SIMs used by suspects in case a complaint is made to the authorities.

*Names have been changed to protect the identities of victims

Published in Dawn, October 28th, 2023