Hahahaha. This is super hilarious! You highlight an important trait of South Asians - we bribe (albeit reluctantly) for our convenience, and still continue to blame the system. Good to know that Pakistan also has bribing for driving licences. It's a full blown business in Bombay. And you can even choose your own birth date.

@Sonal: You can choose your birthdate??? Lol..that's sweet!!! Especially for the ladies!!!

Jimmy is absolutely right. I for one have decided never ever to pay a bribe..EVER...I also decided to get my driving license made. Several, in fact almost everybody at the D/L office in Clifton came up to "get things done quickly" but I flatly refused. The entire process took just two hours, which really wasn't bad. I also did the same when I had to get my passport renewed, NO BRIBES AT ALL!! That also took two hours maximum, which - though not ideal - really was not bad at all. Whenever a traffic sergeant stops me and threatens to impound the vehicle, I calmly say "Be my guest!!" at which he softens up and gives me a fine..This has especially helped me in following traffic rules, SPECIFICALLY obeying traffic signals and not going the wrong way on main roads, because I now fear that I may be fined and will have to go through the long and cumbersome process of submitting it. It all begins with our own self. We have to make a conscious decision of never ever being in a situation in which we will end up bribing a government official; it saves a lot of trouble, not only for us but also for the public at large. So yeah, no bribes, EVER..

We have a more direct name for "charitable donations" and tax write offs Jimmy.

I think think this is actually akin to jihad and what we all pakistanis need to do. By saying no to rishwat the actual queues will start moving quickly itself...its a vicious circle and we all need to learn to saay no....lets all join this internal jihad!!!!!

A government official was arrested for accepting a bribe from a contractor. A friend who went to visit him in the lock-up asked, "How are you going to get out of this mess?" The official replied calmly, "I got into trouble for accepting a bribe; I will get out of it by giving it."

I lived in Saudi for couple of years and I made some good local friends. I moved to the UK after that. I wanted to get the UK license. I asked around, they said if you have an international license or a license from a common wealth country, you might be able to get the English license easily. One of my Saudi friend lives in London. I was talking to him and he said he can get me an international license fom Saudi. Mind you, I did not have any Saudi license at all. So when my friend said he can get one, I asked him, how much will it cost? He said a big nothing. Then he went on to add, however to obtain a fake document in Saudi, you have to bribe people. It is all so strange. I never needed a fake document from Saudi so I can't confirm that what my friend told me is true or not. I did get my Saudi license though while being in the UK. I did not have to go anywhere.

I visited a friend who lived in a gated community in Pakistan. There were guards at the gate who were there to clear it with the person whose house you were visiting before letting you drive in. Even then, somehow, beggars were getting in and going house to house. How? They were bribing the guards. That's what my friend told me. So I asked my friend how can you fix this problem? What good are guards? He just shrugged his shoulders. Then I noticed no beggar came to his door during my 2 hour stay. I asked him why was that? He told me that he has also been bribing the commander in chief of the beggars. That is the snapshot of the whole country. Bribing works!

Wonderful!! We should see our own face before we blame the system or political leaders. A Nation gets a leader it deserves or said differently--Leaders are reflection of the people. Hence change should always begin from "self".

It is bribery only that has landed us in our present state and it is an uncureable disease.

Absolutely brilliant. Funny and as we are!

@Danish: Man, you are the man I hope to be, some day.