I am Shoaib Akhtar

Published March 5, 2015
How dare he ridicule Pakistan on an Indian show? Here is one possible explanation. —AFP/File
How dare he ridicule Pakistan on an Indian show? Here is one possible explanation. —AFP/File

Shoaib Akhtar was recently blasted for mocking the Pakistan cricket team on 'Comedy Nights with Kapil', a slapstick Indian television show which is popular in both India and Pakistan for the Bollywood celebs and crass jokes it has to offer.

A short video clip of the show — where Shoaib unabashedly joked about the age and poor English language skills of senior Pakistani players and officials — caused a viral stir on social media.

“If we add up Misbah's, Younis' and Afridi's ages, this team will itself be 150 years old,” Shoaib says, as the audience bursts into laughter. He brought up the Shabbir Ahmed slip-of-tongue — the "moisturiser" slip we have all heard about and laughed at. He giggled while Harbhajan Singh called Inzi lazy.

The internet may not have broken over his statements, but chest-thumping patriots' hearts did; from National Pride-Keeper Fakhr-e-Alam to Politically-Correct Umer Sharif and like-minded fellows on social media, plenty of scorn was heaped on Shoaib.

How dare he ridicule Pakistan on an Indian show?

Here is one possible explanation: he is one of us.

For those who haven't heard of the show, or wonder how popular it really is with our audience, this randomly selected clip of the show, featuring Kareena Kapoor and Imran Khan (actor, not cricketer), has a whopping 95,000 plus views.

Go figure. Most of us enjoy some cheap entertainment; the mindless, politically-incorrect 'fat' jokes; gender shaming and mock bullying that makes up a big chunk of Indian and Pakistani comedy.

If people are offended by Shoaib, chances are they are also ashamed to look at themselves in the mirror. Because many, in fact, most of us have not pulled any punches when it comes to making fun of, for instance:

  1. Meera's English
  2. The physical appearance of politicians (Ganja, Mr Bean, etc.)
  3. Nasir Jamshed's — or wait, Big Nas' weight
  4. The sexual orientation of some cricket players

The list is unending. As is the hypocrisy.

In fact, it is doubly ironic that someone like Umer Sharif is "disowning" Shoaib over his statements, considering he has in the past verbally destroyed Adnan Sami Khan over his weight and gone as far as making jibes at a handicapped character during his stage-shows.

Indeed, by mocking physical appearance and poor language skills, Shoaib went too far. His actions mimicking former Pakistan Cricket Board (PCB) Chairman Ejaz Butt are despicable. But none of what he did are a far cry from the abuse, mockery and filthy adjectives we indulge in to vent our frustration on the national tragedy of the day on social media — not in India, but on the world wide web.

The sad truth is that Shoaib Akhtar is a product of our environment; an atmosphere where being politically incorrect, and using profanities instead of wit get attention. We do it for retweets. He did it for some claps.

Perhaps he didn't do it for money. Perhaps he just doesn't know better, because he comes from a country where this behaviour goes ignored to a point where it has become acceptable, even entertaining.

It has become such a common practice in our region to react to things the way we do, that it is almost amusing to see the reaction to Shoaib; if we can allow each other to make ill-natured jokes, why are we crucifying him for it?

Contrary to the popular notion that Pakistanis can’t laugh at themselves, Shoaib Akhtar graciously accepted his shortcomings and proved that humour is in fact the best commentary when he made fun of his own half-baked Australian accent.

Thank you, Shoaib for being able to laugh at yourself; your cheap jokes, your poor English and your fellow cricketers.

But are we able to do the same?

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