MUMBAI, Feb 14: There's a strange poignancy about being India's cricket captain. You win honour of leading the country's most celebrated sports team. You lose yourself.

"It takes a lot out of you," Saurav Ganguly admits. "For instance, others can spend time thinking about their own game. I spend a lot of my free time thinking about the opposition, others' performance.

"That's why, when I'm on a long break, I completely switch off cricket. Otherwise, I'd go mad." "When you play for your country, you do get emotional," he says. "And all players are emotional. The only difference is some express it, others don't. "I do it my way," Ganguly says. "There will always be different reactions. I'm just here to play good cricket."

A restrained approach would have made him less controversial. But Ganguly disagrees, "Look, I'm a straightforward, honest person who tries to give his best," he says. "But, I don't always speak my mind."

The immediate task on hand, however, is playing Pakistan who are less than a fortnight away from returning India's visit last year. Is pressure mounting on the captain?

"As much as against any other country," he says. "Mentally, I'm preparing for this series like I do for every other. For me, there's never any difference in intensity." "I'm used to it. Haven't I been Indian captain for five years now?" he says dismissively. -Agencies