“It was so embarrassing when my mother walked into the room while I sat with my friends. The awkward glances exchanged, the quiet giggles, the embarrassed smile I tried to disguise as polite acknowledgment. My mother didn’t get the inside jokes. She didn’t know the trending songs or TV shows, or how to pronounce those slang terms common in our gossip....”

Does this sound familiar? If yes, then my dear teenagers, maybe it’s time for a little perspective shift.

Being a teen is a test, day and night, but so is being a mother to a teenager. While you’re struggling with identity, friendships, moods and endless peer pressure, she’s trying to keep up with a version of you that seems to change every day. You’re figuring out who you are — and she’s figuring out how to love you in your every new form.

She’s the one who knocks softly on your door, even when she knows she won’t be welcomed with warmth. She’s the one trying to decode your one-word replies and your long silences. And while you might feel misunderstood, so does she, because no one told her how hard it would be to love someone so deeply, while feeling so left out at the same time.

She watches you drift towards your friends, your phone, your own little universe and still finds ways to stay close without making you feel crowded. She worries when you don’t eat or go through any mental anguish; she prays for your safety in quiet corners where no one sees.

You are graded with report cards, but her tests don’t come with report cards. They come with a quiet strength, endless patience and a love that doesn’t demand anything in return, not even a thank you.

So yes, being a teen is tough. But being a mother to a teen? That’s a different kind of bravery.

Oftentimes, she doesn’t know the references, but she tries to stay relevant and tries to get to the core of your conversation. She doesn’t interrupt because she’s nosy. She interrupts because she’s trying to step into a world she fears she’s slowly being excluded from, not out of curiosity, but out of the quiet worries she carries in her heart for you, because she is protective of you.

Perhaps many of the teens today think about their mothers as out of place. Outdated, even. Like she didn’t ‘fit’ into the world they were trying so hard to belong to. What they don’t see, or perhaps didn’t want to admit, is how hard it is for a mother to stay connected to them in a world that keeps changing so fast.

Do you think she doesn’t know what you think, how you behave, or what’s going on behind your long silences? She knows — more than you imagine. Yes, my dear teen friends, your parents notice almost everything you do, think and even hint at. But they stay quiet. They watch, they observe, and they let you figure things out — not because they’re unaware, but because they’re giving you space to grow, while silently standing guard in the background.

This is a world full of filtered love, fleeting friends and shifting truths — your mother’s love is the only thing that has stayed. Unchanged. Unfiltered. Unshakable.

So the next time she mispronounces your favourite actor’s name, don’t roll your eyes. Look at her. See the woman behind the outdated references and cautious smiles.

See your first friend, first home and first shield.

She’s not outdated, she’s timeless.

And one day, when you look back, you’ll realise she understood far more than you ever gave her credit for. She was always there, quietly standing by your side, even when you didn’t notice, even when you tried to shut her out. And the moment you finally see her for who she truly is, that’s the moment you begin to grow up.

Published in Dawn, Young World, May 10th, 2025