Dear Auntie Agni,
I am a 20-year-old man from a middle-class family, living in a village. My father is a school teacher and he has always had very high expectations of me. He dreamed that one day I would become either a lawyer or a judge. Unfortunately, my academic performance has always been average. I completed my intermediate in 2025 but, due to my low marks, I could not secure admission in a good university for a law degree.

Because of this, I feel like I have disappointed my father and lost his respect. This feeling has made me extremely hopeless about my future. On top of that, I am struggling with smartphone addiction, which has affected my motivation even more. I feel stuck and unable to move forward, even though I desperately want to improve myself and rebuild my confidence.

Auntie, please guide me. How do I come out of this hopelessness, regain control over my life, and work towards a better future? And how can I overcome my screen addiction, which is making everything worse?
Sincerely,
Worried Reader

‘I Feel I Have Failed My Father’

Dear Worried Reader,
At 20, you are not at the end of your life! On the contrary, you are right at the beginning of it. You feel like you have failed but, actually, this is possibly one of the first times when reality did not meet your expectations. It likely stings more because it involves your father’s expectations. So, you didn’t live up to your father’s dream... don’t let that mean that you failed as his son or that you will be a failure forever. It only means that a particular path did not work out at this time.

As for your father’s disappointment, that is simply coming from a place of fear and concern. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care for you or that he doesn’t love you. But he wanted security and respect for you, and when that did not materialise, both of you were let down and disappointed. However, the disappointment is temporary and the feeling will not last forever. You can build respect again through consistent effort. Success doesn’t usually happen dramatically and overnight.

Also, your phone [screen] addiction is not the real problem. You are simply using it as an escape from your current situation, where you are feeling stuck and judged. I suggest you start again at the beginning, by taking control of your time and creating a simple routine. Taking action, even if you are not feeling motivated, will start to restore your confidence. You do not need to be overwhelmed by taking on the tasks of fixing your entire future right now. Stop thinking about that and only take the next small step forward.

There is more than one way to move forward and live a meaningful life. Also, getting into a prestigious university is not the only way to become successful. Talk to your father honestly, ask for time and take action. This time, let your actions do the talking. Remember, your life is not finished, destroyed or late. This time is simply a blip on your journey. 

Disclaimer: If you or someone you know is in crisis and/or feeling suicidal, please go to your nearest emergency room and seek medical help immediately.

Auntie will not reply privately to any query. Please send concise queries to: auntieagni@gmail.com

Published in Dawn, EOS, January 4th, 2026