Liquid Ludo

Published Jul 07, 2012 04:38pm

-Photo by Shameen Khan/Dawn.com

Behind many closed doors tonight in Pakistan, more people than you care to imagine are going to pop open a beverage that is older than Coca Cola, has more sugar than Pakola and when consumed heavily, needs to be followed up with some Joshanda.  I am talking about the largest alcoholic beverage available in Pakistan: Murree Beer.

I am not joking about Murree being older that Coca Cola either. Murree Brewery was founded in 1860 while Coca Cola was introduced in 1886. Had things taken a different turn and Bhutto not prohibited alcohol, we might have even been watching ‘Murree Studio’ today. It would look a lot like Coke Studio but with a much heavier Rumi influence I am sure.

A public limited company by day whose products are privately consumed by night, like it or not Murree Brewery is a superhero to many Pakistanis, giving them relief after a long hard day of work, and also helping them beat the heat during the many hours of load shedding at night.

-Photo courtesy: Awais Lodhi

In a day and age when gay people can come out of the closet in America and be supported by Barak Obama, the least we can do in the name of progress is finally take the Murree out of the cabinet. And who better to endorse Murree than our President Asif Ali Zardari. It is a tough stand but he should take a shot. Come to think of it, he probably already has.

I know many of you are uncomfortable with this debate, but it is not I who brought the topic out into the mainstream media. A few weeks ago Scout Willis, daughter of the famous Hollywood actor Bruce Willis was caught drinking a cold can of Murree beer in New York City.

This upsets me for a number of reasons.

Firstly, everyone knows that when you drink a Pakistani beer you drink it discreetly.  For Ms Willis to get caught shows a blatant disregard for our cultural practices. The fact that she did not even try to bribe the police to let her go shows how unworthy she was to ever drink a Murree beer.

Secondly, Americans must know we have a very limited supply of beer, for them to take even one from us when they have so many is typical American imperialism. They drained our brains and now they have decided to drain our cans. It is my hope that Ambassador Sherry (no pun intended) Rehman does her patriotic duty and repatriates what is left of the beverage home where it belongs.

In the past I would have turned a blind eye to drinking in Pakistan, but people are going blind drinking some of the alcohol in Pakistan. It is really high time we started to talk about it. The fact of the matter is some people will continue to drink no matter what, and more seriously when other Hollywood celebrities like Lindsey Lohan find out Murree has a 21-year-old single malt and Pakistan hardly has any traffic police, we are going to be in serious trouble.

Take June 26th, International Day against Drug Abuse, as an example of why we need to debate this. On this day, Pakistani Anti Narcotics officials decided to destroy illegal bottles of alcohol they had seized.

So they lined up thousands of bottles on the beach ... and drove over them with a steamroller.

Never before has a moral victory created such an environmental disaster. But they made a valid point. If you have a problem in Pakistan it can be solved by driving over it with a steamroller.

Do not fear the worst. Just by talking about alcohol in Pakistan we will never become a country of drunks. The people who drink will continue to drink and those who abstain will more or less continue to do so. Their will be no nightmare scenario where Walls replaces the chocolate at the bottom of the Cornetto cone with a shot of vodka.

It is just a sad state of affairs when we have to keep lying about it. You can hide the bottles in the morning but the Murree Brewery balance sheet is audited and readily available online. We can try to claim that the Christians, Parsi’s and other minorities drank all of the Murree Beer but if that were true then all of minorities in Pakistan would probably not be so miserable all the time.

I have a friend from Turkey who came up to me at a theatre festival a few years ago with a beer in hand and said “Hey Saad, how do you say cheers in Pakistan” I told him “We have no word for Cheers in Urdu. We all whisper it in English and hope nobody hears the clink.”

 


The author is a standup comedian, writer and producer. He created Pakistan’s first improvisational comedy troupe, named Blackfish.  Connect with him on Facebook and Twitter.

 


The views expressed by this blogger and in the following reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of the Dawn Media Group.


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Comments (153) Closed


heshaam
Jul 07, 2012 10:48am
Also reading you for the first time and I like that 'No anti or pro'. How true it is: "If you have a problem in Pakistan it can be solved by driving over it with a steamroller". Your fine culinary taste must be appreciated: "Replace the chocolate at the bottom of the Cornetto cone with a shot of vodka". It would be better if the translation of the reading from back of the three-wheeled scooter given (just for reference to the foreign readers). Good job. They live who dare!
Afraad_Halaak
Jul 08, 2012 08:19am
Those are not bottles that got steamrolled. These are hearts.
Agha Ata
Jul 09, 2012 03:02am
I am glad you didn't visit Pakistan during Zia rule. :)
a guy
Jul 08, 2012 08:01am
You rock, man. Awesome. very funny article.
sameer shami
Jul 08, 2012 06:33pm
the term for cheers in pakistan is "balle balle!"
Saad
Jul 09, 2012 01:51pm
Very well said!!
Saad
Jul 09, 2012 01:49pm
I agree :))
Saad
Jul 09, 2012 01:56pm
Yes, very well said, indeed. But the point is not enforcing someone's views on the others, sir, the point is to let those 2 - 5 % do what they want to do with peace of mind and not having to hope no one hears the clink!!
Sarah
Jul 08, 2012 08:01pm
To all haters, You don't know what you're missing. Love, Progressive Pakistani ;)
Joe
Jul 08, 2012 08:34pm
First of all, legalize freedom. Then all else flows from there.
Indian
Jul 07, 2012 11:36am
How about considering exporting it to the Eastern side???
Hamdi
Jul 08, 2012 07:57am
Gees...morality is not only about alcohol. If we cannot stop ourselves from drinking alcohol if its legal, then we are having serious doubts about our faith. At this time, people in Pakistan dont drink not because of morality but because its hard to get. Its the same like shutting down restaurants during Ramadan and expecting people to fast. I am sure this is not the image we (or maybe I) would want to carve in my children's minds.
aziahmed63
Jul 08, 2012 08:18pm
very well written I laughed my heads off......
Zeeshan Shamsi
Jul 08, 2012 07:34pm
Do you really think there was Alcohol in those bottles? At the rate of 10,000 at the bootlegger counter, that is all colored water in bottles from "botal gali" Cheers mate, Custom's isn't that cruel !
Ayesha
Jul 08, 2012 07:09pm
i work at a hospital in Karachi and we get a LOT of patients with toxicity resulting from "kachi sharab". and other patients with advanced liver disease.. any form of simple screening or precautions as far as the consumption of alcohol is concerned is pretty much nil. what ever your personal opinion on alcohol may be u cant ignore the health and safety of the general population by just putting up an all out ban on the consumption of alcohol
Kashif Raza
Jul 10, 2012 08:04am
Its a rickshaw, not a truck..R u ok?
saythetruth
Jul 18, 2012 11:58am
Drinking alcohol, even in moderation, 'a dementia risk' http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-18856658
Farrukh
Jul 07, 2012 03:49pm
The article tends to target a very specific group of people. The reality is that thanks to our religion we still consider it as haram no matter what one thinks about it. There is no if and but in our Religion. Hopefully and thankfully we are proud to have carved this distinct thought in our young generation.
Ashai
Jul 07, 2012 03:39pm
All Pakistanis need to imbibe a little beer instead of lassi my be be it will calm them down.
chakraborty
Jul 09, 2012 12:07am
Nasha Sharaab Me Hota To........... Naachti Botal Maikade Jhhomte Maikhane me Hoti Halchal Nashe Mein Kaun Nahin Hai Mujhe Bataao Zara Hic..........
hamza khan
Jul 07, 2012 04:50pm
agreed. unfortunately, our country is severely lacking any genuine sense of faith and belief in what is right and wrong. alchoholism, being promoted from within and our 'friends' across the border, is rampant. sad..
Socrates
Jul 09, 2012 10:38am
Here is another translation of ayat 16:67 from the sura Al Nahal. " And among fruits ye have the palm and the vine, from which ye get wine and healthful nutriment: in this verily, are signs for those who reflect."
amber
Jul 09, 2012 08:30pm
NO TO ALCOHOL!!!!
saythetruth
Jul 09, 2012 01:25pm
JZK my brother you are on track.
Pun Intended
Jul 08, 2012 08:31am
yea, and I am told the Thailand has turned prostitution into a high revenue industry, I am sure with the kind of diverse races in Pakistan, we can also have a strong prostitution industry, and export can bring thousands of dollars.....but for that we also need open mindedness.......
Mystic
Jul 07, 2012 12:17pm
I don't want my children to have access to alcohol from street corner shops. PERIOD. According to you, "those who drink will continue to drink", so there is no need for a change. Is there? I don't drink, neither do almost all of my friends and family who live. I am sure scenario would be different if alcohol was readily available. Most of my friends started drinking after they moved abroad, reason being easy availability.
Jamshaid
Jul 07, 2012 11:12am
I hate this article and am crying over spoiled alcohol(shown above)
Andy
Jul 09, 2012 02:37pm
Thanks & cheers !!
sudy
Jul 09, 2012 03:25am
They destroyed the bottles; I am not sure what was in there!!
saythetruth
Jul 09, 2012 01:30pm
Again you are clueless about the simple meaning of the Ayat . Where does it says get drunk and alcohol is good for you. In many places in Quran Alcohol is forbidden for consumption but I will not tell you, finding it on your own will help you read Quran and maybe you will understand the Ayat as whole and no just picking words.
Ch. K.A. Nye
Jul 08, 2012 11:50am
Ah Yes... and as a result the 'easy availability' of ganja, heroin etc., has made for a far larger problem and all its ancillary off-shoots: crime both petty and major, gangs involved in the drug trade, drug-lords and their private armies... the list goes on an on and on.... The question is: which is the lesser of two evils??
DeepKar
Jul 07, 2012 04:17pm
Seriously buddy!!! 21 yr old 'single malt'..
Saad
Jul 07, 2012 12:40pm
Those who drink will continue to drink and its not a problem if they do so in the privacy of their homes, but please dont stuff this PC crap in our faces and make the case for drinking as if it was alright to do so.
Ahsan
Jul 07, 2012 12:44pm
wonderful read! loved the article! loved the celebration of hypocrisy and sarcasm! Yes Muree Brewery is definitely an unsung Pakistani hero.
sara khan
Jul 07, 2012 02:19pm
Dude start drinking and you shall find out more than half the mohhalla drink even the Qazi
Amir
Jul 07, 2012 12:38pm
Me too. By the way, what is the name of this holy grail of whiskey's?.Can't wait to get this 21 year old "Single Malt".
sara khan
Jul 07, 2012 02:17pm
Oh well here in Sweden, i always say 'Khayyam' and have made it as the official Urdu 'Cheers'. khayyam being the persian author. The reason i chose Khayyam is that it is still a habit since childhood to drop some beer on the ground in the name of Khayyam. So perhaps Saad you can use Khayyam and put it to my credit :)
Hasanalirana
Jul 07, 2012 01:35pm
The word ''lassi'' means drink/smoothie made out of yogurt, originating from the Indian subcontinent. Milk, sugar, salt and ice can be added as per taste.
Tariq
Jul 07, 2012 01:32pm
I am not a drinker but a Great article! This shows the export potential our country is missing out on. The Murree 21 Year old Malt whisky is recognised as the best that would not be out of place amongst the best Speyside single malt whiskies from Scotland (Michael Jackson, whisky critic, UK). Also Pakistan has the perfect climate in the northern areas for grape production. Yes, wine for export too. But it's down to open mindedness, education and tolerance.
Hassan Bajwa
Jul 08, 2012 09:53am
I suppose you haven;t quite grasped the point of saad's article. Fact is that MBs finances show that total sales has actually INCREASED since alcohol was banned for muslims in Pakistan. So availability clearly is not the reason start drinking. People drank LESS in Pakistan when it was more readily available. How would you explain that?
aditya
Jul 09, 2012 12:30pm
ever heard of separation of the church and the state?
Hasanalirana
Jul 07, 2012 01:15pm
how abt ;'Lassi Studio', people do get drunk by it (especially after eating loads of spicy Chicken Curry) and its legitimate in all parts of the world, even in on the streets.......
aaa
Jul 07, 2012 01:09pm
On one hand one is screaming over how corrupt politicians are our problem and on the other hand one finds an article every second day on alcohol as if this is the biggest problem in pakistan. What about writing about something that is a problem. How are people discussing such useless topics any better from corrupt politicians. One way would to be more productive would be to just put 2 or 3 sentences about what ones personal wishes are in the start or in the end of an article and use article to write something meaningful.
Agha Ata
Jul 07, 2012 01:03pm
I have been in the USA for 2 decades. I am sure there are at least 2 humorous people in Pakistan. One who wrote this article, and the other who got his truck painted as he did. But after laughing a little I wanted to cry.
Avtar
Jul 09, 2012 01:13am
Nice article. Thanks to extremists for sparing Muree Brewing at least the enjoyment of "minorities". I am looking to try Muree Lager. I have not found one in Canada or India yet.
KHIZAR
Jul 07, 2012 01:00pm
Nice one about " The Article" - secondly liquor should be legally open for All in LAND PAK so people can chose the good one from Murree Brewery, Quetta distillery & Indus distillery instead of many who dies due to Fake house made Poisoner Liquors !
Anthony
Jul 07, 2012 04:03pm
Free to do whatever we want in the privacy of our homes? Denotes a very poor moral conduct. If something is intrinsecally evil then it must be avoided and if not... well then nobody should ban it. Another question is if something is bad for health... ah! thats another discussion. Also smoking is bad for health but I do not see it banned in Pakistan... also eating a lot is bad for health and nobody bans oily and fatty food... so, I am confused... Is drinking alcohol an evil action?? Please distinguish in the public arena what is morally wrong from what is not healthy and decisions will be much easier.
Almanar
Jul 07, 2012 12:28pm
Last line was the best. Whisper and hope no one hears the clink.. awesome!!
Kashif
Jul 09, 2012 01:41am
Great article and great comments (only from the beer lovers lol).
shadocharya
Jul 07, 2012 12:03pm
Chief this was fantastic reading
Ahmed
Jul 07, 2012 11:44am
A good comedian creates humour without violating the society norms whereas a bad one usually does that. Alcohol and advocacy of alcohol are prohibited in Islam; no matter what ever the case it is. Of course, one can talk about the dangers of immorality of alcohol but not vice versa. The author suggestion "who abstain will more or less continue to do so" does not stands stands true in reality. The writer of this comment is not a Taliban but just an ordinary Pakistani:)
Mantharia
Jul 07, 2012 10:46am
Do one have to look hard for this 21 year old and single " Malt" I mean, dont take me wrong I do like a sip now and then. I will look forward to it when home next time.
Shoaib
Jul 07, 2012 10:25am
HAHAHAHA! Awesome one Saad! Loved it!
A&W
Jul 07, 2012 10:26am
A miserable write up, and here I was expecting some solid reasoning on his part but as usual like all the pro alcohol crowed another miserable failure. Only thing I will give you is the destroying the alcohol bottles on the beach but than again that is the least of our disasters. What one does in the privacy of their homes is their business but the argument they present is as flabby as the ones being used by extremists to enforce their ideology.
saythetruth
Jul 09, 2012 10:16am
Well said
Aftab Zaidi
Jul 07, 2012 10:16am
Excellent article with a great pinch of sarcasm.
Infidel
Jul 07, 2012 10:15am
Cool mate - finally taking on the sacred cows of this nation
Altaf Husain, Mumbai
Jul 08, 2012 06:21pm
Where in Mumbai does one find a 21 year Muree Millennium Reserve? Can't wait.
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 11, 2012 01:50am
Seriously? read it again.........slowly.
Siddharth
Jul 08, 2012 05:47pm
21 years single malt!!!!! Wow.....
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 08, 2012 04:11pm
I used to live in Islamabad before moving to California. I was elated to learn that there were so many people who drank, that was the best time in my life. I am glad to see that there are people who have the strength of character to write about hard topics, keep it up Saad and if ever I am in Pakistan or you are in San Diego, your drinks are on me. And as Sara says........................ Khayyam
HakunaMatata
Jul 08, 2012 03:57pm
Funny stuff. Getting through all these comments might require some of that 21-year old malt, bud. Cheers Thanks for being satirically effective.
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 08, 2012 03:55pm
hahhahahhaaaahhahhahha....................love it Disco.
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 08, 2012 03:52pm
You go girl!!
aditya
Jul 09, 2012 11:53am
lol. dude, seriously. i am from mumbai. everyone i know drinks. and, all of them are real champs in their field... music, math, arts, science, etc. i drink and i have a master's in engineering. hitler didn't drink or smoke and we all know what he did. you are confusing correlation with causation.
Advertiser
Jul 08, 2012 03:48pm
This article is brought to us by Murree Brewery in association with Walls Cornetto. Crazy advertising!
disco Mullah
Jul 08, 2012 10:36am
and you sir are a Hypocrite ! mazay bhi lay lo aur bura bhala bhi kahoo .... tsk tsk
Ch. K.A. Nye
Jul 08, 2012 10:32am
Murree’s Millennium Reserve.... Most offical outlets carry it... At least the one on Badar in DHA does. It is indeed delightful...
Disco Mullah
Jul 08, 2012 10:27am
I respectfully disagree. I never tried alcohol in Pakistan. But when one day I tried it ...... Than the only regret I had was why I didn't do it before :P
Ch. K.A. Nye
Jul 08, 2012 10:22am
The Pres' father-in-law was well known for his daily Royal Salute until , that is, when he realised that the Boots were no longer royally saluting him...
Ch. K.A. Nye
Jul 08, 2012 10:17am
Please educate me: Is imbibing that is haram or is it drunkedness? I also see the word ""ijtinab" (… Rijus Min Amal-i Al-Shaitan-i Fa-ijtanibu La-Alakum Tufl-i-Hoon; Al Maeda; 5:90). .... Meaning "refrain" or in Urdu "Prhaez" and not "prohibition".
hammad
Jul 08, 2012 10:18am
Thank you sir for promoting the famous, ' Single Malt " at the international level.
sahba
Jul 09, 2012 05:09pm
I totally agree with you.i live in the US and wonder why so many positives for the article???Have they forgotten alcohol is haram and so is its business.Yes those who drink will still drink but legalizing it in an Islamic state which is already on the verge of disaster ???
Saad
Jul 09, 2012 02:02pm
Very well said. I agree 200%......!!
Pravin
Jul 09, 2012 10:31am
I look forward to that. Let Muree Beer and Single Malt drinkers like us (taunted as 'Sharabees' in both the countries) usher in peace between us. Our ' sober ' politicians failed to do this for the last 60 years. Pravin (pravinvs@yahoo.com)
Socrates
Jul 09, 2012 10:19am
In sura 16, Al Nahal, Allah praises alcohol. So alcohol is not banned. Ayat 16:67 "And of the fruits of the palms and the grapes-- you obtain from them intoxication and goodly provision; most surely there is a sign in this for a people who ponder. " So drink beer and enjoy.
saythetruth
Jul 09, 2012 10:15am
Where do you get these figure do you know more than 150,000 in USA due to alcohol related accident. Many USA universities are banning on campus drinking due to poor performance of their student. Serious Health issues, Rape, child abuse, prostitution, broken families are linked to alcohol abuse. All these studies are available on TED and in New End gland Medical Journal. The problem with Pakistan is e have many illiterate people who are trying to copy the west to solve their problem. In the west alcohol has reached to pandemic and as for as India goes it is still a 3rd world country with most of the poor use more than half of their income to support the alcohol addiction. All these Indian commenting on how good alcohol is Sham on them for supporting alcohol, it killing you entire nation. In Pakistan our problem are more political and we will overcome them but India addiction is a huge social problem and it is sucking the life out of India.
U.E. Hayyat
Jul 08, 2012 09:36am
I get the humor, but what's the point of this blog ?
M. Sharique Siddiqui
Jul 08, 2012 09:34am
Murree Beer use to have slogan.. "Have a ?Murree? with your Curry?"
Bashir Manzar
Jul 08, 2012 09:12am
Wonderfully written article. In a lighter way, the author has done the autopsy of hypocrisy that is, unfortunately, prevalent, more than anywhere, in Muslim societies. I, during a conference in New Delhi a few years back, met a Pakistani journalist. Someone asked him that is alcohol available in Pakistan. Pat came the reply: Milti Tou Hai, Lekin Munafiqat Ne Mehngi Kardi
Chris Cork
Jul 07, 2012 09:52am
And their Sapphire Gin is to die for! Bloody gorgeous. Murree Brewery...perhaps our greatest unsung national asset.
Pirbhat Shams Memon
Jul 07, 2012 09:55am
I Loved your explicit way author sahab! It was for the first time i read any piece of yours and am impressed :)
jgrozny
Jul 07, 2012 09:56am
Germans, I'm told, rate Murree's Millennium and Lagger highly.
Vishnu Dutta
Jul 07, 2012 04:30pm
Export it to India and take on king fisher. Hey, may be murre beer co can buy a team in PPL. i hope that isnt haraam
Arif
Jul 07, 2012 04:31pm
I live in California for the last 3 decades now I am thinking about starting a campaign. I am going to endorse you to be the next President of Pakistan. God Bless you we need more people like you keep up the good job
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 07, 2012 04:40pm
Drinking or not drinking is just like taking drugs. It is a clear choice, you choose not to drink and saying your friends overseas drink just because alcohol was readily available is an absurd argument. There are billions of people who live overseas and not all of them drink.
Rimsha
Jul 07, 2012 04:44pm
well said......
Tariq
Jul 07, 2012 04:50pm
Germans are the pioneers of larger type beers and if they rate it as being good then it's good!
hamza khan
Jul 07, 2012 04:50pm
keep your opinions to yourself.
samran
Jul 07, 2012 04:54pm
sad state of affairs in pakistan. what bothers me the most is that you cant even talk about it. LEGALIZE!!
junaid
Jul 07, 2012 05:56pm
good article, i wish Zardari would legalize it.................
pseudomonas
Jul 07, 2012 06:46pm
Exquisitely written piece. Am not a drinker myself, but am coming around to the view that not partaking of this great Pakistani product is akin to a lack of love for the motherland.
Aamir, San Diego USA
Jul 07, 2012 06:52pm
A ray of hopeful light in this pitch-black night. Indeed there are more people who drink than your readers will ever know.
Samia
Jul 07, 2012 07:31pm
Since debate has boiled down to personal experiences. So, im gonna tell my own. 'friends who used to drink in Pak drink when they are abroad, who did'nt use to drink in Pak never drink even if they are given free' !!!
OG Om
Jul 07, 2012 10:20pm
people who drink and want to drink will always find a way to do so. Legalize it and tax it! at most it'll generate revenue which can then be reinvested into other sectors.
B Goswami
Jul 07, 2012 10:28pm
Which The Pakistanis DO NOT HAVE and are not willing to HAVE?
Hindi
Jul 07, 2012 10:41pm
Would someone be kind enough to translate whats written on the back of the auto?
ilyas khan
Jul 07, 2012 10:53pm
Why we closed the duty free alcohol shops from our International airports while Dubai opened up to snatch all our stop-over air traffic?
Ali
Jul 07, 2012 11:32pm
Dude thats a million dollar idea!
Ali
Jul 07, 2012 11:35pm
Why don't you do it. There is an opinion section. Secondly don't read anything that doesn't interest you.
dhillon
Jul 08, 2012 12:04am
oh god,..... chill guys, that's when you need a cold one.......
abdul
Jul 08, 2012 01:10am
amazing!!!
Tayyab
Jul 08, 2012 01:25am
Dear Sir, When you chose to abandon your country, abandon it properly. Don't waste your time worrying about it.
khan
Jul 08, 2012 01:11pm
The point is .......!!!!! He who drinks goes to sleep. He who sleeps does not sin and he does not sin goes to heaven. so all of those who loved that article wants to get drunk ........
utsav
Jul 08, 2012 02:37pm
:)
Khayyam
Jul 08, 2012 02:05am
Agha Saheb could you please translate what is written in Urdu for some of the less educated in urdu and other side of the border folks please
rk singh
Jul 08, 2012 02:09am
@ Saad Haroon Madhu - aka alcohol was consumed by Hindu gods for fun and frolic. We are simple mortals. Period.
yasir
Jul 08, 2012 02:34am
Great Article - first time we write about what is "right". Lets at least start this debate. People of Pakistan need at least some way to entertain - at the moment its only food..food..and food !!!
Sheikh Sarmad
Jul 08, 2012 03:32am
Half of our poetry is about wine and goblets...but don't find any traces in real life....the skeletons in the cupboard.
Tasawar
Jul 08, 2012 03:59am
you know i was going to reply to your siggestion ,but then why bother
Pravin
Jul 08, 2012 04:02am
Dear Pakistani friends are you aware that in having a stock-pile of 21 year single malt, you are having a gold mine? There is a great demand for it in India and those imported from Scotland are terribly expensive, with the chepest 12 year old costing Rs.5000 a bottle. So let us jointly suggest to the foreign ministers of our countries who are meeting today in Tokyo ,to include the import of Pakistani single malt in our bilateral trade negotiations. I am certain both of them having lived in the west know the value of 21 year old and will jointly endorse this( at least there will be one agreement at the end!!) We all agree that both India and Pakistan need to break the proverbial 'ice' in our relations and there is no better way to break the ice other than with whisky !!
Tasawar
Jul 08, 2012 04:02am
isnt that how gay rights became recognised .....by in your face .and if its taht bad why are you on an evil machine made by the blasphamous
Tasawar
Jul 08, 2012 04:04am
sorry but must disagree ....the attempt is to shed light , not make right or wrong
Tasawar
Jul 08, 2012 04:09am
one qwal put it straight yea aqle masti hai "agar nasha hota sharab men to nachti bottal"
TASAWAR
Jul 08, 2012 04:10am
im in teh USA with all the acces i need to alcahol i once in a blue moon drink it
saythetruth
Jul 08, 2012 04:11am
Fear Allah and put your pen to better use.
saythetruth
Jul 08, 2012 04:11am
You keep on drinking we don't need you advice.
saythetruth
Jul 08, 2012 10:30am
Excellent article and I believe it about the time that once for all we make a decision on alcohol. We must have a healthy debate based on facts and figures. The alcohol debate has two angles a religious and factual/medical. The religious is very easy to understand for all Muslim, if you have a doubt about it than it mean we are doubting your religion and you need to have you head examined. The Quran and Hadith is very clear about Alcohol, it is s Umail Khabis (mother of all evil). Quran mention at multiple instances Alcohol consumption is harm and anybody who earns any living by selling or promoting Alcohol is doing harm and the path will lead to hell. Even in Christianity and Judaism alcohol forbidden you can Google it not very hard to find this information. It is clearly forbidden in two of the most popular Christians books, the book of John and Exodus. Christian still consume alcohol and are not following their religious teaching. It a very lame excuse that Alcohol should be allowed in a Muslim country, no Christian or other minority will die if alcohol is taken away from them but we know alcohol abuse will defiantly kill you.
Alpha November
Jul 08, 2012 04:53am
To LEGALIZE all such affairs shall bring about better results long term! I see my country dying of corruption in most areas above all the minds of most..! So LEGALIZE is the only way to go..! Great Article indeed..! Future of the country lies in PTI & LEGALIZATION of all those things that continue to damage the core infrastructure of this great country...! In all seriousness if Malaysia / Indonesio / UAE / Iraq / Turkey and many other's can do it, why can't we...! Cheer's guys keep thinking and keep talking...!
dilawer
Jul 08, 2012 05:05am
Why ? Are you a mullah?
tikki
Jul 08, 2012 05:32am
I love it,this is how you have a conversation,no religious cult barking down your throat,no one shoving guilt down your throat and drum roll please...........no fake maulvi's pretending to be God.I thought it was so funny,I am a Pakistani,I don't drink much when I'm home(Texas) but when I visit Pakistan,I love the Murree beer and even the malt.Its no secret that 8 out of 10 Pakistani's drink,and so what if they do.Every time I'm in Dubai,Saudi,Bahrain,I see hundreds of A-rabs sitting around drinking out in the open.Funny you mentioned Zardari and Sherri Saad,we know they will support the idea lol.This is a great article not to metion its funny and honest.Salude,cheers.
Muslim who drinks
Jul 08, 2012 06:38am
Lovely! I am a Sufi Muslim (I think I am) and I do enjoy the "Lal Rung". When I visited Pakistan in 2010, I really had hard time finding the gift of paradise. Destroying whiskey worth several millions dollars on beach shows how sick this nation's adminsitration has become. Why could not they sell it to India, Thailand or even China. It could have fetched several millions dollars that could have been used to help people with narcotic problems. Who cleaned the beach? What a pity!
Overseas
Jul 08, 2012 06:51am
Dear Sir, Why not extradite all overseas Pakistanis and try them by Military court.
Chindi chor
Jul 09, 2012 05:30am
To all supporting the ban - Why single out alcohol ? There are lots of other things forbidden in Islam. Why dont you go after and eradicate them.
Indian
Jul 09, 2012 05:31am
Could anyone translate what is written on the back of the truck ?
Honest
Jul 09, 2012 05:34am
Miserable way to highlight social evil, author is trying to highlight his pro-alcoholism as a sign of his 'enlightened moderation'.
kaka
Jul 09, 2012 05:37am
For all the people who are in favor of legalizing / promoting alcohol please see the link below http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11660210
Truth
Jul 09, 2012 05:52am
Are you muslim????
Mystic
Jul 09, 2012 06:19am
Does advocating ban on alcohol means I am pro-Heroin? Ban them all intoxicants, punish all them drug traders and I'll be happier. Does being lesser evil mean not an evil?
desi
Jul 09, 2012 06:53am
lol.I love it.
Anas Tanveer
Jul 09, 2012 07:02am
Excellent writing. I want to address my country's mates , who are in kind of a shock having it published, but rightly said the author that Murree's Audit report is online and accessable for each one of us. So, we just can't claim that this writing is hypothetical. Its quite logical , supported by the stats and figures. And we, as a nation now should take up things in serious manner, instead of rejecting the true facts in that age, where i saw 1 or 2 empty canes on side ways of roads , almost every day. So, from my side, Cheeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrsssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Saad ;)
desi
Jul 09, 2012 07:09am
Dear Indian friend(I'm going to guess you are Indian)I send you an invitation to come to Pakistan next time I'm there,you are welcome to come and enjoy our punjabi hospitality along with murree beer and the malt.I do it here in Texas with my Indian and Pakistani friends,we tell eachother Indian and Pakistani jokes and have a good time.
Reader
Jul 09, 2012 07:23am
For the non-Urdu readers, translation on the back of the Auto Rickshaw reads, "Dear President Musharaf, Congratulations on introducing women's rights Bill, Now please introduce Men's Rights Bill, it is very hard to get a Drink (Beer) .
M Saleem Usmani
Jul 09, 2012 07:56am
Funny article...but how can we progress after bring drunk is a question in my mind? I have never heard that an alcoholic ever passed a major milestone in science or engineering or medicine. Let's stop fooling ourselves. There are people who imitate west no matter what, and to whatever end they have to. For these 2-5% people, why should they be able to force their views on other 95%? I know most of comments will say, that all people drink, but they are missing a point, all people around drunks are usually drunks but that is also not 100% true. Our religion is our guiding light and our culture. Let's not find excuses in not practicing it. I have always respected Saad's creative capability, but put it to good use.
Asif Syed
Jul 09, 2012 08:26am
Tikki are you sure about what you said "Every time I'm in Dubai,Saudi,Bahrain,I see hundreds of A-rabs sitting around drinking out in the open." If that is true all Pakistanis must be informed about it. We have set ourselves a course whereby we will become fully Arabs. There are plans to abolish all languages except Arabic, ban music, dance theaters, put women behind full veils and encourage polygamy for all men. But if Pakistanis find out, especially if our mullahs find out, that Arabs drink, then in our zeal and passion to become 100% Arabs we will imitate the Arabs. Muree beer will flow freely, bars will be set up in our masjids and Pakistan will be a less miserable place.
Aniket
Jul 09, 2012 08:03am
Dude come to India. We generate such ideas by the dozen, esp when drunk. Agree, Vishnu? ;)
Socrates
Jul 09, 2012 08:31am
Allah did not ban alcohol. If alcohol was forbidden then Allah would not have created it. In fact there is an ayat in the Holy Qran that praises alcohol. It is men who have banned alcohol consumption.
Socrates
Jul 09, 2012 08:37am
It has been proven by medical authorities that the daily consumption of a smal amount of alcohol, about two 12 ounce beers, is good for health as beer opens up the arteries and facilitates blood flow. Besides it has also become evident that religion is also a drug. it has the same effect on the brain cells that alcohol and other stimulants have. Relgion is worse than other drugs because its harmful effects have a greater reach. I have not heard of imbibers of beer rushing out of a bar and killing people because someone said something that goes against a certain faith. But we have had many incidents, most recently the killing of a "malang" in Punjab, when a crazy religious mob goes out and kills human beings after an incendiary sermon by a maulvi.
PMALIK
Jul 09, 2012 08:54am
Fear Allah and dont lech at your neighbour's daughter! Beer is safer
hamzah
Jul 09, 2012 09:06am
' If someone wants to drink he will always drink,' What a pile of rubbish.This is a classic excuse for people who want alcohol legalised in Pakistan. Common sense says if alcohol is available more readily and easily, more people will drink it. Also interesting to see most of the comments here are from Indians and overseas Pakistanis who represent 0.001% of opinion in Pakistan. Perhaps a lesson could be learnt from the western countries where the incidence of alcohol liver disease has increased ten fold, since it's beneath you guys to read the Quran and learn from it!!!!
anonymous
Jul 09, 2012 09:13am
that is not truck :) thats an auto rickshaw, what written is 'Mr President congrats on passing women's right bills, please also pass one for men, to ease drinking problems'
Krish
Jul 09, 2012 04:14pm
This is a great comment. Not to forget that the term "bootlegging" came from the same country responsible for the drones, though about 80 years ago. Prohibition was a massive failure in the very country that expended the most in history, to enforce it. The question really should be, which is the lesser of the two evils? As a strict vegetarian, who still drinks a couple of rounds before dinner, which yogis told me is vegetarian too, anyway, I know which side I have to be on. But ultimately,it is not religious or political or legal writ that is going to enforce or control anything, it is just plain and simple individual knowledge or beliefs.
Socrates
Jul 09, 2012 09:51am
Germans like their beer better than their religion. Their per capita GDP is $38,000. No German risks his life to migrate to Pakistan because he feels he will have a better life. Pakistanis like their religion more than beer. Their per capita GDP is $2,800. Millions of Pakistanis would risk their lives to go and live in Germany if they could because life there is better for them. I will say no more.
saythetruth
Jul 09, 2012 09:55am
Don't even try to comment on something that you are clueless about. No where in Quran alcohol is praised. Allah has created carbon monoxide why don't you inhale it by your logic it should not hurt you.
tikki
Jul 10, 2012 03:30am
love it lol,come to Pakistan Aniket,we do too hahahahahaaha,we just can't do it in public
Devi
Jul 10, 2012 04:28am
No way! If that's true, that's the most awesome slogan ever!
azharali
Jul 10, 2012 05:22am
The write up is well articulated. It is the high time that we should face the mirror and be bold enough to see our true reflection. This is who adn what we are ! Influcenced by the western culture only when it comes to partying but in terms of hardwork and dedication; only when we ask the state to be welfare state but not when we are required to put in extra time and effort for the betterment of the country; only when we want the education to be free but not when we are required to study hard in government universities. This is who we are. So anyone drinking a can of beer in another country is merely a business consideration. That has nothing to do with our society. We are better of without liquor.
anwar jawaid
Jul 10, 2012 06:09am
No it is"Dabi Raak"
The liberal
Jul 10, 2012 07:02am
And if you see Muree financial statements most of their revenues and profits come form the liquor division when there is a ban on their exports, so Pakistanis consume their rightful share of the forbidden drink and their factory is conveniently stationed in front of the GHQ. So all in all they have the support of the power that actually controls Islamic democratic republic of Pakistan. Cheers!!
Jack77
Jul 11, 2012 07:14am
but you are in cali. what do you have to do with president of pakistan. You are not going back. are you?
anonymous
Jul 12, 2012 06:08am
I originally meant to commend the wit and vigor behind this well written article, however reading the barrage of anti alcohol write ups i feel that as a society we seem to be moving backwards. ... Why don't we ever condemn hashish being available at street corners with rickshaw drivers and our chowkidars. Alcohol however is the mother of all evil. We're even okay that Paan shops will cell cigarettes to minors without question, gutka is available despite government bans on it and chalia / supari is the preferred treat of masses of children and adults alike. Dont get me started on pakistans favorite vice, Paan sputing... currently the most graphic and chosen medium for Pakistan's many mouth artists their handiwork or should i say mouthiwork displayed on our walls, roads and public monuments alike. Maybe we need to take a page out Malaysia's book...
Hafeez
Jul 15, 2012 07:46am
Keys khoob kaha
Hafeez
Jul 15, 2012 07:40am
We had to do it to re-assert that we are a nation of hypocrites. Nothing more.