THERE’S a lot to like about American Pastoral. It surprises me to say that, given that I am not a fan of Philip Roth (who wrote the book it’s based on) and I utterly despised this summer’s Indignation, another adaptation of a Roth novel. The credit goes to director and star Ewan McGregor, who overcame my doubts with a nicely told, good-looking story.

One early scene in particular sticks. It’s the 1950s and Dawn (Jennifer Connelly), who is Catholic, wants to marry Seymour (McGregor), who is Jewish. Before the engagement can proceed, she goes to meet Seymour’s dad, Lou (Peter Riegert). Lou is . . . less than pleased. So begins a negotiation, mostly dealing with how to raise any children the marriage might produce. Dawn wants her hypothetical children to be baptised; Lou says no. Dawn wants them to learn the catechism; Lou doesn’t know what that is. Dawn wants them to take Communion; Lou responds that no grandchildren of his will “eat Jesus”. It looks like a standoff, and he starts to dismiss her.

It doesn’t work. She tells Lou that she loves his son, they are going to get married, and that she and Lou had better come to some sort of agreement.

We don’t know the particular rules of their religious covenant, but by the time daughter Merry (played first by Ocean James, then by Dakota Fanning) is born, it doesn’t seem to matter. As Dawn and Seymour’s marriage progresses, we see that she and Lou have developed a genuine affection for each other. They defend each other. They even love each other. When teenage Merry leaves after a run-in with the law, Lou is there — arguably more for Dawn than for his own son. When it comes to in-laws, it’s a best-case scenario: even major differences can be put aside for the good of the family as a whole. Merry is something more important than Dawn and Lou as individuals, someone they love more than they love themselves. More importantly, Merry is someone they love more than they differ with each other. It’s through her and for her that Dawn and her father-in-law unite, because they know that to dig in their heels, to refuse to talk, to refuse to listen, means shattering the whole family.

It couldn’t have been easy, but ending up together was more important than winning. Being respectful led to being kind, and being kind led to being united. What a lovely real-life American pastoral that would be.

By arrangement with The Washington Post

Published in Dawn October 23rd, 2016