Getting compliments from friends and family is one of the best feelings you can have. In that moment, you feel like flying and everything seems wonderful, because compliments really do have the power to boost your confidence and self-esteem.

However, there are also times when you hear not-so-nice comments that can ruin your mood and even your whole day — because they hurt.

For example: “Oh, you look pretty, but it would have been better if you had worn high heels because you are quite short!”

This so-called compliment carries a pointed jab that can easily spoil someone’s mood and even affect their mental health. Nowadays, almost all of us are struggling with anxiety and depression. With technology taking over our lives, people don’t get much time to reflect on themselves, and that’s why many are becoming careless and harsh in their conversations.

You can’t control what others say, but you can control how you react. The trick is to build confidence and believe in yourself

Whether it’s a colleague at work, friends at school, a relative at a family gathering, or a stranger commenting on social media posts — rude and toxic compliments are everywhere, sometimes disguised as jokes and other times as criticism. Many people wrongly consider being blunt or rude as a sign of boldness and confidence, without caring about the damage their words may cause.

This behaviour has become so common that you can’t escape it or force others to speak kindly. So how can one stay calm and deal with rude compliments?

The answer lies in building strong self-esteem and confidence so you can stand tall, no matter what others say. It’s very simple: just own yourself. Yes — the way you are, the way you dress, the way you choose to live. When you truly embrace who you are, it silences all the noise around you.

If you face mean comments regularly from classmates or people around you, simply brush them off.

Remember, everyone is free to give their opinion, but that doesn’t make them right or wrong. And yes, if someone throws an uninvited comment your way, you can calmly respond with, “Did I ask for your opinion?” or politely change the subject.

Always stay polite and respectful yourself. For instance, if you have created a piece of art and you love it, but someone mocks it, simply tell them you like it and that’s what matters. It doesn’t have to be labelled good or bad. What counts is that you are satisfied with your effort and proud of it. That’s the real essence of self-worth.

E. E. Cummings, an American poet and artist, was right when he said, “The hardest challenge is to be yourself in a world where everyone is trying to make you be somebody else.”

And yes, it really is hard. People who are short, dark-skinned, or overweight are often the easiest targets of rude remarks. But don’t let anyone decide how you should look or what you should wear to be considered beautiful. Remember, every human being is a unique creation of God Almighty. Motivate yourself to do good deeds and keep reminding yourself that your mental health matters the most.

So, my dear readers, never give a mean or rude comment to anyone around you.

Everyone is trying to live the best way they can and may already be facing struggles you cannot see. Your unkind words could hold back their progress.

Always remember, you are the one making decisions for your life, and you are the one fighting through your own hurdles. So, be yourself and follow what your heart says. Don’t waste your energy crying over negativity that others throw at you. Don’t burden yourself with the pressure of winning constant praise or compliments. Just do your best, love yourself, and live your life the way you want.

Published in Dawn, Young World, October 11th, 2025