TV anchors are always looking for some big fish to be trapped.

“Babboo, do you remember you once told me that it was the Russian poet Yevtushenko who had compared justice with a train that was always late?”

“I have one more for you. This is from another cynic who said that laws were like a spider's web from which anything small, if trapped, could NOT get out but all big things would break through and escape.”

“I don't agree. We have an independent judiciary and it means business this time. It intends to act neither as a train nor as a spider's web. I am sure it won't allow the big ones to escape from what you call the spider's web.”

“You really think so? I cannot comprehend how the big ones would allow themselves to be trapped or could even be persuaded by friends to go to the courts and get themselves cleared. What would be the modus operandi?”

“Getting trapped or persuasion from friends aside, there is another way. One could have a sudden surge of wisdom and himself resign and then request his successor to initiate court proceedings against him.”

“What if the new incumbent does not take any action, that is, proceed against the outgoing person? What will be the action plan then?”

“In that case, the incoming one should consult a TV anchor.”

“What?”

“Yes, a TV anchorperson! These anchors have become very clever; they know all the tricks of the trade. Their confidence level is touching the sky. They talk more fluently and are brighter than all the Chaudhrys, Khans, Sardars, Mirs and the Bhais. They have become so smart that as compared to media, they could find more lucrative jobs in the intelligence agencies. I am sure the guys will give sound advice.”

“But why should TV anchors give advice to politicians? It is not their job. For this there are advisors,” I said.

“Don't talk of advisors. They are Nadan Dost.”

“You have not answered my question. Why would a TV anchor take the position of an advisor?”

“You seem to have doubts about their credentials. You see, they have enthusiasm and drive — and ideas.”

“And they are always looking for some big fish to be trapped?” I interjected.

“Don't be sarcastic.”

“I am telling you they are only after Breaking News!”

“The public loves to watch Breaking News,” said Babboo.
 
“You have not told me what kind of advice the anchor could give — for instance, to the President of Pakistan.”

“He'll advise him to resign.”

“Suppose he really does — I mean, resigns?”

“Then the anchor would approach the incoming president and advise him to proceed against the outgoing president.”

“What?”

“It will make another 'Breaking News.”

“Suppose the new president refuses to oblige? Suppose he is a decent man and does not want to embarrass his predecessor?”

“Then the anchor would advise the outgoing president to go to the court and offer himself for accountability on his own. Yet another breaking news!”

“What if the court tells him that in the absence of any evidence against him, it could not take suo motu action? The complaint must come from somewhere and somebody.”

“In that case the outgoing president would pray to the court to take contempt of court action against the new president.”

“Are you crazy? What kind of advice is this?”

“Let me explain the plan that could be offered by the TV anchor again the president resigns. He requests the incoming president to proceed against him in a court of law. The incoming president does not take action. The outgoing president goes to court. The court asks for a formal complaint. The outgoing president goes back to the Presidency and again asks the new president to proceed against him. The new president again hesitates to take any action. The outgoing president goes to the court and files a contempt of court case against his successor...”

“Yaar, pagal to naheen ho gaye ho?” I cried.

“Can't you see how many 'Breaking News' there are in such an episode! And don't forget, the more breaking news the more advertisements and sponsorships for the channels!” Babboo said.

“Do you want to see advertising becoming the fifth pillar of the state?” I remarked.

As if not having heard me, Babboo reflected for a few moments, then said “The anchors have a fertile mind; who knows, they might even base their advice on an incident that took place in the US many years ago.”

“What was that?”

“In case of their plan not working, the anchors might advise the court to do what the United States court did in the 1950s. There was this case of admission of black children in the Little Rock Central High School. When the school's authorities did not allow the black students to be enrolled, the US Supreme Court asked Washington to move the US Army and enforce its verdict that racial segregation in schools was unconstitutional and that black children could not be denied admission to the Little Rock. Finally, the US army was successful in getting the black children admitted to the school. It was big Breaking News all over the world.”
 
shahidsm34@gmail.com

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