THIS past Monday morning proved a difficult class to teach and it was not just because it was hot on the heels of the mess that was the India-Pakistan cricket match. I didn’t take into consideration just how difficult the class on obituary writing would prove to be.

Let me explain: as part of that lecture, I ask students to write their own obituary so they can understand that this genre of writing is about life, in this case theirs, their accomplishments, how they want to be remembered, and for what. It also allows them to reflect, and reconnect, with what really matters.

However, this past Monday, there was a heaviness in the room, which I soon learned was because several of my students knew Mustafa Amir, the 23-year-old man kidnapped and brutally murdered last month. His case is ongoing so I do not want to weigh in on the investigation, other than lament how the media is treating it as a soap opera.

Of course, I couldn’t have known their connection to Amir or the young men and women allegedly involved in his murder but I should have known this story would be all over the social media platforms they consume. In this case, it includes Instagram and TikTok, and is a major point of discussion on WhatsApp groups they’re a part of. They told me things that aren’t reported or reflected in the mainstream media, which causes a real disconnect between not just the mediums but between generations.

How can you create something if you can’t sit still long enough to think?

A generational divide is not new but it may be widening as demographics shift, especially with technological innovations. For example, my childhood was spent outside and screen time was limited — there were few English TV shows in the countries I lived in, and while we watched Bollywood movies on VHS, we weren’t allowed to just plonk ourselves in front of a TV forever. We read, had hobbies, played, and spent time with friends and extended expat families.

Things are different now — and how.

Each generation witnesses a wave of new inventions that widen the gap between the young and old, but innovation has come at a dizzying speed in the last few years and brought with it a host of anxiety-related issues. Social media has especially killed imagination by offering audiences a highly curated perspective.

In the last seven years of teaching, the number of students discussing their anxiety openly has grown. I’m glad the cloak of shame around this has been lifted but I worry they don’t have the tools needed to deal with anxiety. They aren’t used to being alone with their thoughts; there is so much distraction in the form of apps, etc, that they do not know how to deal with problems on their own. Smartphones have transformed childhood — let alone adolescence — and caused the “great rewiring” of an entire generation’s social and intellectual development, writes Jonathan Haidt in his book The Anxious Generation.

I’ve read a lot of studies about the connect between social media and depression in teens but Haidt’s book gave me a new perspective on “digital under-parenting” and “real world over-parenting”. Children have unsupervised access to digital devices, while also being protected from harm in the real world. It is a strange mix which has resulted in a generation with addiction-like behaviour, and who are unable to handle challenges which are a part of everyday life.

I understand the world is very different to when I was growing up and I can sympathise with parents needing to protect their children — but at what cost? You and I have likely faced similar experiences of being lost and surviving because of essential life skills that come with, well, life.

My fear for each cohort grows every year. They are spen­ding more time, Haidt writes, on sc­­reen-based leisure activities, compa­r­­ed to my generation where we were outdoors, getting hurt or lost, etc. This generation has access to (on-screen) attention 24/7 but the cost is feelings of isolation, a rise in eating disorders and self-harm, as well as depression and anxiety — higher in girls. It has ruined their ability to concentrate and pay attention. We will feel the consequences of this when there will be a slowing down of innovations. How can you create something if you can’t sit still long enough to think?

We are paying too high a price for children who go through “puberty with a portal in their pocket” as Haidt writes. He has answers which are possible to enact, maybe enforce, like making it harder for children to get social media accounts. Or not giving children smartphones until they are 16, disallowing phone use at schools, and most importantly returning to a childhood that involves more personal interactions, less device use. This isn’t just a parent’s responsibility; it requires input from schools, Big Tech and governments.

The writer is a journalism instructor.

X: @LedeingLady

Published in Dawn, March 2nd, 2025