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COVER STORY: Doing the ‘right’ thing dutifully
Human rights are the best thing that has happened to mankind. Not to mention that now even animals have rights. Today, we have the right to be what we want, do what we want and the way we want, provided we do not break the law. The right to make our own decisions is indeed a great thing but one thing must be kept in mind. How equipped or experienced is one when it comes to making an important decision? In the fast-paced modern world of today, the age level for making personal decisions is becoming less and less. Recently, I was relating to a friend how my eleven-year-old daughter not only decides what she wants to wear herself but is equally vocal about my wardrobe. I was taken aback when my friend responded by saying that her five-year-old niece in America told her parents quite confidently what item of clothing she wanted to wear and what she did not. We both laughed as we compared our own childhoods to when we were just handed a particular dress to wear when we were about to go “out”. And moreover, had to be dressed before all the elders in the family. Not forgetting the fact that before leaving, a look of approval was in order from my eldest sister as far as I was concerned.
I remember the first time I had to wear tights. It was so funny! I was told that they were the best and softest quality available somewhere in Europe where my elder sisters went with my grandparents and all little girls there wore them. Well, what choice did I have? I was made to wear the tights and I still remember how much I hated them and how uncomfortable they were. And to top it all, there was the can-can — a stiff kind of skirt that made dresses all puffy and fluffy! Can you imagine? And ponytails were made so tight that tears came out of the eyes. “How nice and neat you look” were the remarks of approval. All the time we were jealous of our elders who could wear clothes they liked. But no one complained, as it was the “right thing to do”. There was a code of conduct to be followed at every age.
How far the world has come in just three decades since my childhood! Kids today decide everything concerning almost every aspect of their lives. No longer does it seem necessary to eat what mom has made or what is on the dining table. A hot meal on wheels is just a phone call away and the kids of today can order whatever they want to eat from any of the numerous fast-food places that have opened up. Though it is a fact that this has made life easier for parents as they do not have to think for hours what to cook for fussy eaters, it is also true that sometimes the meal is not wholesome or nutritious. But today’s young generation has the facility and will eat what they like.
Youngsters today have more “rights” than the previous generation, and are very much aware of them. The question is: are they also aware of their duties? Duty to ask permission from parents for any matter, duty to help with chores, duty to respect their (parents’) ideas and suggestions?
How often do we forget that life is not only about “taking” but also about “giving”? The other aspect that children nowadays speak freely about is where they will go and where they will not. They feel it is their right to decide which family dinner they want to go to or which cousin they want to meet or not. Previously, kids weren’t even asked if they felt like going to a certain place. It was the parents who decided whether they should go or not. Family occasions were a must to attend and children did not hang around where elders had discussions regarding some serious matter. The young generation of today is quite mature and often takes part in family arguments and discussion with their elders.
In short, youngsters today have more “rights” than the previous generation, and are very much aware of them. The question is: are they also aware of their duties? Duty to ask permission from parents for any matter, duty to help with the chores, duty to respect their (parents’) ideas and suggestions? How often do we forget that life is not only about “taking” but also about “giving”? And this goes for parents, too. How much time do we spend with our children? Everyone hears of “quality” time in this fast-moving world where both parents are sometimes working away from home. But it is not enough just to spend half an hour or even an hour of “quality’ time with the children and leave them to do as they please for the rest of the day. Every child needs guidance, supervision and protection. Servants cannot take the place of parents who are too busy with their social life and other commitments to always be there if there is an emergency, God forbid, or if a child just feels lonely. It is very satisfying for a child just to know that a parent is around even though he or she might be busy. In other words, elders too must do their duty before asking their kids to do the same.
On the other hand, children must help their parents in any way they can. For all the “rights” available readily today, the first thing is to be grateful and to realize one’s duty is the right thing to do. Cleaning up one’s own room and taking care of one’s things is important. Moreover, listening to what parents have to say regarding any matter of choice and giving their advice due consideration is also the duty of the children. Remember, for all the intelligence and maturity the kids of today have, nothing beats experience and that is what elders have. They have been through turmoil and hardships, the difficulties of growing up and the responsibility of being parents, so listening to what they did when faced with any situation will help the next generation shape their lives. Even if the same rules do not apply anymore, just the insight that an adult might have will prove to be food for thought.
The other important factor is respect. The respect for people, respect for the laws of one’s country and the respect for other people’s rights as well. It should be the duty of every individual to realize not only their own rights but also their duty towards others. The best way to do that is to ask ourselves whether we are as strongly interested in our duties as we are regarding our rights? To feel strongly about one and not about the other would be an imbalance of one’s existence. And to lead an imbalanced existence cannot be beneficial in the long run.
Today, if we lack in our duty, tomorrow no one will do their duty towards us and the cycle will go on till the world will, one day, turn into a vicious planet of self-centered, self righteous human beings! It is a great achievement to be aware of one’s rights, after all, if every individual did not have his or her rights, mankind would then, once again be a suppressed race. Today, human rights’ lawyers stand for justice for the downtrodden so that they can exercise their rights. Women are being given their right place in society and can speak up regarding their personal lives. Emphasis on education in poverty stricken homes, which force little children to work, is also highlighted. So let’s celebrate these rights. And while we rejoice in the fact that we have our “rights” in sight, let’s not forget our duties, which are equally important.
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