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Super Sis
I’m a 12-year-old girl and I had a crush on a boy from my class. I unconsciously told the whole class about it, and now the boy hates me (I think), but I haven’t spent even one day without thinking about him ever since our last day of school. I have his email address and I’ve sent him two messages but he hasn’t replied to me. I’m also obese and currently on a crash-diet programme. I went to the doctor recently about a medical problem I have, and she said that my problem is only caused due to psychological
stress. I think I’m upset because of the boy, and I don’t want to be ill because of him. I’m too afraid to tell my mom, since she gets upset about things like this (she knows I had a crush on him) and I don’t want to upset her right now, because she’s a working person, and since my father is out of town, she is extremely busy. I love my mother, and I don’t want to disappoint her, especially when she takes out time every day to make our vacations fun. Please help me.
Bummed Out.
Bummed out, don’t be sad. It’s not your fault if you developed a crush on some guy in class … it’s common to do so at your age. But yeah, I guess it was naïve to talk about it with all your class mates because it ended up in attracting unwanted attention. Perhaps the boy is feeling uncomfortable around you, but rest assured that he wouldn’t hate you for having a silly crush on him. In fact, he must be secretly feeling flattered.
Any way, who cares about him? What is done is done … you can’t undo things, so don’t cry over spilt milk and stop worrying about what he is thinking. There is no need to email him any more. It’s time to close this issue and move on. Besides, your class mates will forget about this little incident by the time the season is out, so you shouldn’t worry about them either. And who said you’re the only girl to have a crush on some guy in class? I’ll bet each and every girl in your class has a secret crush on some one or the other … and that goes for the boys as well. You’re no different, so stop feeling like a fish out of water.
Let’s talk about you. Be clear on one thing, B.O: You may be overweight, but at the age of 12, it is dangerous and harmful to go on a reduction diet of any sort, kappish? You need to consult your doctor first about what foods you can cut down on and what replacements you should take instead, but please please don’t go on a crash diet … the repercussions are severe and far fetched. Instead, work off the excess weight via aerobics. In your case, exercise is all the more important. Know why? Exercise creates endorphins in our body, which are “happiness” hormones, and they are actually good for health. Endorphins are believed to produce four key effects on the body and mind: they enhance the immune system, they relieve pain, they reduce stress, and they also postpone the aging process. What more do you need? Not only will you be trimming yourself down a good bit, you will also feel happier emotionally. It will also be good practice to meditate and pray in what ever way you are used to. Meditation/prayer decreases anxiety/depression and increases emotional stability and self-actualization. Be thankful for the so many things you have, instead of getting worked up over the little things you don’t. Distract yourself by taking up a favorite hobby or two like reading, painting, etc.
It is a very relaxing and rewarding experience, and once you start, you won’t be disappointed. As far as your Mom is concerned, don’t worry. This isn’t a big deal … it could happen to any one. If you feel she will get worked up about it, don’t discuss this with her. You won’t be lying … she knows how you felt about the boy any way, and now you will be moving on. You are a very good girl to be so considerate of your mom’s feelings, and that is the most important thing above everything. So stop hurting over silly, stuck-up boys and start healing yourself. You have a long way to go before talking in such a tired manner. Cheers! i
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