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SUPER SIS
Dear Super Sis
I am a student of class V. My problem is that a boy from my class is interested in me. But I am not, two of my friends like him. And both of them are jealous of me. They try every possible way to insult me. Two other boys from the other section of my class are also interested in me and I also like one of them. When the boy from my section saw that I am not interested in him but in the other boy he caused problems. But I don’t want to leave the boy in whom I am interested. Please tell me what to do.
Worried Saggitarian
My my... 10 years old and already going on 21! What is wrong with you, little girl? You’re juggling boys around already! Tell me something: what exactly do you mean by “being interested in someone”? You’re in class V, kiddo! Are you planning to settle down already?
Okay, you’re right: your two friends are being really mean, just because some boy wants to be friends with you. But have you looked at their point of view? Maybe they want your attention because you are their friend. What you should do is talk to your friends during lunch break. Tell them on their faces that you don’t like the way they have been treating you and ask them what they want. Don’t be rude; just reassure them that you are, of course, a very good friend of their’s, but you want to make chums with this boy too.
Also, tell Boy I that it’s okay if he wants to be friends with you, but you sure don’t like him creating problems for you if you are friends with Boy II. But remember that you can seek a true best friend only in a girl since you yourself are a girl. Similarly, boys’ best buddies are boys, and it’s only natural. So remember: don’t lose the friends close to you in the glamour of other “cooler” people, okay?
And please, you are still a little girl, and it would be best if you acted your age. Haven’t you heard of the song “girls just wanna have fun” and the saying “boys will be boys?” Trust me, when I say “stay out of such issues and try acting the kid”. You’ll thank me later.
Confidential to A Bereaved Heart.
These are indeed tough times, but you are not alone. You’re 16 and the eldest child. Parents unconsciously expect a lot more than they would admit of their first-borns. And so, you’re the perfect little example. But this does not mean at all that they don’t love you. It’s just that they want to make you perfect so that they can be proud of you, and in their wish to do so, sometimes they may lose track of what is fair to you.
This may sometimes end up hurting you, but don’t lose heart. Instead of plunging in self-pity, look at the broader picture: your parents are also human, and all humans make mistakes. You can never understand the kind of love your parents have for you until you become a parent yourself.
The point is, it’s not quite the end-of-the-world that you think it is. I have learned from personal experience that staying quiet rather than being harsh always helps. Have you ever truly tried staying quiet when you think your parents are being unfair with you? If your mother is screaming at you to do chores, try not arguing with her for once, and simply do the chores with a polite “Yes, Mom”. In fact, go the extra step and ask her “Anything else you want me to do, Mom?” and give her a sweet smile instead of a frown or a complaint. You will see the difference yourself.
Sometimes, the best way to kill the wrong is by being more right than ever. So promise yourself that you will be the perfect daughter for one whole week: no complaints, no rudeness and no self-pity, and see the difference. Believe me, it can do miracles, because “tough times never last, but tough people do!” And of course, you should pray to God to make you something big! You deserve it since you work so hard at studies. Some day, you will make your parents really proud. Drop me a mail when things get better.
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