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SUPER SIS
Dear Super Sis,
I am 13 years old and the problem is that my mother has suddenly become very religious. We had a normal routine before, but now it has changed totally. It is difficult for me to accept this sudden change. I wish to live a normal life like everybody else. Please help me.
Depressed Leo
I understand how you feel. It is very difficult to adjust to sudden change specially at your age — on the brink of adolescence and teenage. But there’s nothing to get worried or depressed about. Something like this once happened with my friend’s mom, too, but my friend is still alive and well. I’ll tell you what you can do, by taking a page from her diary.
Let your mother do as she pleases as it is her own life. Don’t think too much about it. When she lectures you or asks you to do something, listen to her quietly without arguing or entering a debate, even if you have no intention of succumbing to her will. You can compromise with her on the places you go to. Stay away from things that would provoke her to come down heavy on you, like listening to loud music or wearing skimpy clothes. Enjoy yourself to the hilt at school, and don’t cut down on your social life.
Once in a while, do as she says to keep her lulled. Make her feel wanted and loved, by hugging and kissing her and lending a helping hand whenever you can. You can also bring her a gift or two to keep her on your side. Doing this you might even get your way sometimes.
Bottom line: Let her do what she wants (unless she intends to give away the house in charity), and you do as you please.
Dear Super Sis,
My problem is complicated. I am an 18-year-old Muslim boy who has fallen in love with a Hindu girl. I really love her and I can’t think of forgetting her. All of my friends think that I am insane but I have one question, “Is falling in love a sin?” I believe my parents would ask me to forget her, but I can’t. It’s been two years since I fell in love with her. She too is aware of my feelings for her. Please tell me what to do.
Worried Taurean.
You’re asking the wrong person. I’m not romantic; I’m realistic, and very practical. I believe that individuals have entities of their own. They have their own strong personal traits, likes, dislikes, loyalties, etc, in so many spheres, that it’s very difficult to accept and live in harmony with another individual. I think a person should try to find someone with the minimum amount of social, personal and religious differences, so that together they have a better chance of getting along. Getting together with someone surely involves a lot of thinking, decision-making, compromising and adjustment. In the flush of love it might seem irrelevant, and at your age specially, but religion is a very important part of an individual’s life.
Perhaps you don’t know, Muslims are not permitted by religion to marry a Hindu unless she accepts Islam. A marriage otherwise will be null and void.
If she is willing to leave her religion for you then you can marry her. If not, then I would advise you to try and forget it. There are so many beautiful, talented, intelligent, compatible and eligible girls out there waiting for Mr Right, that it just isn’t worth the bother, is it? Wait for the right moment as you still have a lot of time before you get married.
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