May 08, 2008

Do we need to dedicate a special day for mothers in a culture where they are showered with love every day of the week?

Basically, Mother’s Day is a concept initiated by the West, though it stems from ancient Greece, which celebrated a festival dedicated to Cybele, a mother goddess of the Greeks. Surprisingly, the Arab countries, too, celebrate the event but on a fixed date i.e. March 21.

The utter commercialisation of such an beautiful day set me wondering whether we are merely aping the West or is it an expression of our sentimental attachment to our mothers. In Pakistan, generally speaking, children do retain their mother’s values and so do the elders. Those whose mothers have passed away remember them with nostalgia.

Zehra Keramali, aged 63, lost her mother when she was very young. She still remembers her religious commitments and personal interaction. “I miss her lovely green eyes, filled with love, looking at me. The love in those eyes still engulfs me,” she sighs nostalgically and adds, “I am glad my children celebrate this special day and express their love more explicitly.”

Hina Nazim Husnain, Karachi Grammar School student exclaims, “Oh! Of course, Mother’s Day should be given even more importance. A student’s life is so busy, we tend to take for granted what our mothers do for us on a daily basis, and I love to give her flowers, gifts and cards.”

Ali Altaf, 15, another student of Karachi Grammar School, retorts, “I endorse Mother’s Day, when do we ever express our love and gratitude for our mother’s love and contribution for our upbringing. That’s one day, I make sure I cram in all the expressions of love.” This is an excellent sentiment from a modern teenager, retaining the values of the East.

My daughter Faiqa is more exuberant, “I feel every day should be Mother’s Day. We should make sure we express our love vocally every living day. Sure special gifts should be showered on our mothers for Mother’s Day, but do we need to wait for a special day to give them gifts? Even a flower or two holds a special place in our mother’s eyes. Why wait for an annual customary day to give them gifts? Remember, the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world –– simply hold that hand as sacred.”

Sana Sibtain says, “Why do we copy the West in everything? The children in the West don’t have time for their mothers so they have a fixed Mother’s Day to give cards and gifts.” She further adds that we interact with our mothers on a daily basis, we show them our love, and we don’t need an annual Mother’s Day.

“People in the West are so busy that they don’t even speak with their mothers for weeks. Let them have an annual day to remember their mothers; we do it on a daily basis. I refuse to have an annual expression of love,” adds Sibtain.

When I was in the US on Mother’s Day recently, the hype was building up to giagantic proportions and the day was rampant with commercialisation. Ads on TV, in stores, books and periodicals all nudged the children to buy gifts for their mothers. Is this all there is to Mother’s Day?

Certainly, celebrations and gifts are a part of life, but what is more necessary is the continuity of the expression of love. Which mother would not opt for more time, interaction and love rather than a mundane gift?

An annual Mother’s Day need not be there only to felicitate the mother but also to reinforce our vows to express our love on a daily basis.