May 17, 2007

Thumb sucking is part of the growing-up process for most children and like the use of bottles, pacifiers, and mother’s milk, it can be overcome with time and effort, writes Saulat Pervez

Thumb sucking is the most basic, natural instinct for infants which they use as a means of comforting and nourishing themselves. Initially an infant may start with sucking his fist, but as he grows older and becomes more adept at basic motor skills, he might settle for a thumb or two fingers, provided that a pacifier has not been introduced.

Some people erroneously think that thumb sucking is due to a child’s insecurity or emotional problems. However, this tendency simply fulfills their need for extra gratification which gives them a soothing sensation whenever faced with stressful situations, for instance, when they are being disciplined. Being a relaxing activity, it also induces sleep.

My daughter was three months old when she showed the first signs of thumb sucking. As soon as she’d pop her thumb into her mouth, we’d take it back out, for as first-time parents, we thought thumb sucking was a bad habit. Yet, in the long run, our daughter won because gradually we discovered that after a crying spell, she was able to fall back to sleep all by herself when sucking her comforting thumb.

Now, which parents would refuse such a gift of independence and self-sufficiency? Certainly not us, weary as we were of the 40-minute stand-up-only rocking ritual we had to undergo every time our bundle of joy decided it was time to sleep, day or night. The expensive swing we had bought to perform this onerous job for us had been summarily rejected.

As she grew older, her habit became more established and the thumb became a source of satisfaction even during waking hours. Along the way, I did set some rules, for example, no thumb sucking during reading sessions or mealtimes.

When we were blessed with another baby, a boy this time, I didn’t think much about thumb sucking. This is exactly why he took me by complete surprise when one fine morning, I found him sucking his thumb in his sleep. He was only six weeks old and naturally quite immature in his motor skills –– or so I had thought. I would watch with utter amazement as he’d spread his fingers over his face and, after some struggle, manage to manoeuvre his thumb into his mouth. Sleeping through the night for him was quite an easy feat soon enough.

All of us have heard horror stories about thumb sucking: the girl whose thumb turned black because of constant sucking, the boy whose permanent teeth came out all crooked as a result of thumb-sucking. Although my pediatrician had assured me that my children’s thumb sucking was harmless so long as they stopped by the age of five, I was uncertain how they would “stop.” It is true that most children outgrow this habit by the time they turn five. However, watching my children I intuitively knew that they weren’t going to give it up so easily.

So, when my daughter turned two, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Smiling smugly at my own cleverness, I would “adorn” her thumbs and fingers with henna and as soon as it would dry up and start to shed, I would refresh it with another coating.

As days passed by and my daughter was prevented from sucking her thumb, I rejoiced at my innovative strategy.

Sadly, the deception didn’t last long. Soon enough, she learned that under the heavy coating of green was her satisfaction-filled thumb –– still quite accessible –– and as more and more henna ended up in her tummy or on the floor, I had to resign myself to defeat and let things be.

Once my daughter turned three, I decided to give it another try. Humbled by my earlier debacle, I knew I had to handle things differently this time. By now, she was quite sensible and understood that thumb sucking was not necessarily a good thing. I used this to my advantage.

First, I spoke with her over a period of time about her thumb sucking and how she should give it up. Examples of her cousins and friends who didn’t suck their thumbs helped to drive the point home. Once, it was clear that this is a habit that must go, the next step I instinctively took was to assure her that although it would be a difficult process, I would help her achieve it. A combination of self-awareness and ‘Mama’s help’ was quite successful as I was to find out soon.

I then proceeded to apply a solution (liquefied instant coffee) on her thumb and fingers, kept her busy with various activities, and was ever-present to counter any opportunities for lapses. I also helped her fall asleep at night by lying down with her. When this routine was followed for a period of a week or so, my daughter managed to get rid of her habit.

My son, however, still sucked his thumb since he was only two. When he turned three, I tried the same formula on him, and it was amazing how fast it worked. Perhaps his sister’s weaning had prepared him more than anything else.

A few words of caution though. When undertaking this task, like any other change for toddlers, parents must make sure that they have plenty of time on their hands because they have to be constantly vigilant. The solution (whichever one you may use) must be refreshed before the child wakes up, right after he/she uses the bathroom, eats his/her meals, etc. Constant care must be taken particularly in the initial days that the child is not given any opportunity to balk.

Just as sucking is instinctive for a baby, thumb sucking, too, is a part of the natural persona of some infants. In fact, it has been proven with the use of sonograms that some babies suck their thumbs while they are in the womb. With that in mind, we must maintain a positive attitude towards this habit. It is part of some children’s growing up and like the use of bottles, pacifiers, and mother’s milk, it can be overcome with time and effort. Indeed, if fostered lovingly, it can be quite advantageous for both parents and children. However, it should be remembered that –– like anything else in nature –– thumb sucking can run amok if it is not nurtured properly.