May 20, 2004

A greater number of women are now seeking assistance from Darul Amans. Governments need to recognize the significance of the services rendered by these institutes and provide for improving them, argues M.B. Kalhoro

In today’s uncertain times, one common observation suggests that young women, either married or widowed, would rather seek refuge in Darul Amans than go to a police station or the kot of a landlord when seeking shelter from the wrath of their families. This, however, doesn’t answer the question as to why these women opt to leave their homes, relatives and even children in the first place.

Some say that the woman is either dissatisfied with her life due to family disputes, or she objects to the old traditions and revolts against customs in an attempt to lead her life in her own style. Illiteracy, social imbalances and sale of women coupled with discrimination are some of the reasons women run away from homes and arrive at such shelters through courts, says Gulnaz Ali Abbasi, assistant director Darul Aman, Larkana.

This institution has been functioning from a rented building since it was established in Larkana in December 1995, when the first batch of 20 inmates was brought here from Sukkur. In the past women were kept as ‘sam’ with preferably powerful landlords or a family in Sindh. Once she was declared sam with any family, no one could dare to harm her and if they accidentally did, then those who had kept her as sam would sacrifice everything, even their life, before allowing intruders to lay hands on her.

The noble tradition of providing shelter to a sam has weakened and become unreliable perhaps due to a decline in values, inter-tribal clashes and the inefficacy of the writ of the law. What one sees now is that instead of seeking support from these people, women, whether married, single or widowed, acquire shelter at Darul Aman. Some of the women find that only this house provides them shelter where they can avoid being killed under the pretext of being kari, said Abbasi.

According to Abbasi, family crises, fear of being killed as kari, corporal punishments and sub-human treatment are other factors that compel women to revolt and seek refuge. Sometimes these women end up at the Darul Aman having lied to the court about their situation when in reality they just want to marry a man of their choice. According to Abbasi, once they are released from the shelter, they marry their “friends”, although she adds many of these so-called friends do not turn up to take these girls away, a tragedy in itself.

Inmates in the Darul Aman, each has a story to tell of the injustices they faced, the degradation and inhuman treatment they endured, and the degree of mental torture they suffered. Eight women and three children are presently residing in Darul Aman in Larkana. “We have not paid 13 months rent to the owner of this house,” said the administrator of Darul Aman.

Construction work on a new building for Darul Aman is in progress for which the district government has sanctioned a handsome amount so as to have a permanent government building for the purpose, said Khursheed Ahmed Junejo, district nazim, Larkana. The meagre funds coupled with no transport facility and a lack of an instant medical aid system are affecting the condition at Darul Aman.

The medical superintendent Chandka Medical College Hospital, Dr Shabaig Chandio agreed to permanently post a lady doctor at this institute, and with the arrival of a new EDO he has released ample funds of Rs70,000 to run routine affairs, said Abbasi.

Abbasi also said that it was usual for inmates to spend six months at the Darul Aman, adding that four sisters of Larkana district who had property disputes lived continuously for five years at the shelter. A woman from Jacobabad, Shabiran Jakhrani, spent 15 months at the institute and even after that she declined to go with her parents, and finally moved to Gosha-i-Aafiyat in Karachi.

The accounts given by the inmates that are taken down in official registers do not always reflect the pain and miseries these women have suffered. Most references in the registers reveal that many of the inmates accused their parents of selling them to aged men, while they concealed their real problem.

This correspondent met a girl Shabiran who had come to the Darul Aman for the second time on April 15. She had been released on January 20, 2004 but after marriage she fled to Quetta only to return. She looks underage and said she was four months pregnant but did not know the father of the child.

This pale-faced girl from Mandi Bahauddain, Punjab, said that her parents had forcibly married her to an old man. “I lived with him for three years and he died of an asthmatic problem,” she said. She then went on to say that her in-laws tortured her and indicated that she had been kidnapped by a woman called Zarina who sold her in Shikarpur where she was subsequently married to a person who was already married. He killed his first wife on the charges of karo kari, and used to beat Shabiran regularly, which is why she ran away from home. When she was found at the Shikarpur railway station the police took her to Darul Aman.

Abida Sahar, who identified herself in the court as Bablee, while narrating her story said that her father forced her to marry an old man named Fareed Ahmed whom she hated. In retaliation she confessed to have fallen in love with a policeman who was working in Dadu. Abida left her home and has been in Darul Aman since, during which time no one has been to visit her, said Abbasi. However, Abida is convinced that one day the policeman will turn up and they will marry.

Nasreen Rani, who is hardly 18 and hails from Sargodha said that when her parents planned to marry her to an old man she revolted and eloped with a resident of Ratodero (Larkana). She was sent to Darul Aman when her parents took legal action against her. Although her parents are now willing to respect her decision, and arrange her wedding to show the relatives that she has married with their blessings, if only to save their honour, she has refused to return to them.

Sumaya, wife of Asif, is hardly 20-years-old and an orphan. Telling her tale she said a housemaid kidnapped her from Karachi where she was working as her assistant. She was brought to Behram town (Larkana) and sold and married to Asif. Sumaya said that after the murder of her husband over domestic differences, the other family members regularly beat her. They told her to leave home and she sought refuge in Darul Aman. Now she wants to marry of her own will after she is released.

On April 18, 2004 Dawn reported that a man allegedly killed his sister on the charges of her being a kari after taking her home from Darul Aman, Larkana. He did this after assuring the district and sessions court that she would be in his safekeeping and would not be harmed. The police have not been able to find her body and an FIR was not registered.

Sabhai, 30, resident of Mulamo Banglani Goth near Thul, Jacobabad district, had fled the village around two months ago after her brother had declared her a kari. The police produced her in the court of the civil judge in Thul, where Haji Ghulam Yasin decreed that she be housed in Darul Aman, Larkana, the government’s shelter for women.

Shortly after, her brother, Dadan Banglani, went to Larkana and took his sister back to the village, after giving the district and sessions court a personal guarantee that she would not be harmed. She was sent to Darul Aman on March 10, 2004 and released on April 14, 2004 said Abbasi. Within a span of four years no one except Sabhai had been killed on this charge.

The Darul Aman, Larkana has its managing committee and some philanthropists regularly donate ghee, flour, pulses and sugar, etc. The horrifying stories of the inmates call for urgent attention of the state and society by strengthening the existing laws to prevent under-aged marriages, customs like karo kari, ensure a ban on the selling of girls and giving them in exchange as compensation. A system of checks and balances should be evolved and a women’s force formed to control forcible marriages with old men which could work in close liaison with the women police and other law enforcing agencies.

The government should allocate sufficient funds to run the affairs of Darul Aman — a vital institution desperately needed by those who have nowhere else to go for fear of losing their lives.

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