SOCIETIES are often plagued by a number of social evils. These evils may exist either due to the unbridled freedom in a society or because of unnecessary restrictions. With the passage of time frustration takes its toll on the people and usually the cause of this frustration is poverty, unemployment and limited resources that are not commensurate with the many needs of the common public. As a result, the common man starts to get involved in harmful activities in order to meet his basic needs. Sometimes age-old customs and traditions also put his life in danger.
In our society, one such custom is the so-called system of dowry. This custom is an abominable one. Dowry is a gift given by parents to show love and affection to their daughter at the time of her marriage. Nowadays, it is supposed to be a gift not for the daughter, but for her in-laws. The in-laws of a girl these days unashamedly and blatantly ask the girl’s parents to meet their demands in the form of dowry.
Over a period of time the real meaning of dowry, also mentioned in our religion, has changed. In modern times, it constitutes of luxuries not necessities.
The wedding of daughters has become a very grave problem in every society. This is the reasons why the birth of a girlchild makes her parents unhappy. They always pray for a male child so that they wouldn’t have to face the problems that occur because of the girlchild. A female child is considered a heavy burden to her parents.
In our society, dowry is not a single factor that affects the marriage of a daughter. Other factors like social or ethnic background and the economic situation, are also taken into account. If a proper match is found then it becomes necessary to meet his or his parents unnecessary demands. Often the poor parents of girls that are going to get married try to meet the demands of their son-in-law’s family by borrowing money from affluent relatives and lead the rest of their lives trying to get rid of the debt.
One major reason for the increasing number of divorce cases in our country is that the girl is not married with enough dowry to support her, or her parents fail to provide her with all the luxuries of life. The in-laws of a girl start to tease her, which sometimes results in girl’s committing suicide.
The custom of dowry also speaks volumes for the inequality that exists in our society. There are many rich and powerful families who spend millions on their daughters’ marriage. But the majority constitutes of those parents who can’t afford such lavishness. The difference between the rich and the poor is quite apparent and the dowry issue makes it more glaring.
Extreme or excessive use of anything is forbidden in our religion. It is said that Allah likes things that are moderate. These days marriages have become a symbol for exhibiting wealth. The excessive use of money has become a need to compete with the others. Extravagant spending in the form of food, dresses, gatherings, gifts on wedding ceremonies has also become imperative. Without these things marriage ceremonies are supposed to be incomplete or lacklustre.
In this regard, it is very important to have some form of legislation to restrict the amount of money spent on dowry as well as on lavishly celebrating marriages. This will not only help in reducing the economic burden on our country, but will also help the parents hailing from the middle class to find better husbands and in-laws for their daughters.
Due to the lack of resources, more often than not girls go past the age that is deemed marriageable and parents fail to find good life partners for them. There is nothing wrong in having customs and traditions that a society can identify with. However, such customs should benefit society and not burden the people with unnecessary liabilities.
