FEW weeks ago, the great great grand-father of a very prominent business clan passed away. The family marked the occasion with a grand affair.
A large, quarter-page obituary was instantly booked in the leading newspapers with announcements of the forthcoming rites for the relations, family-friends and the common folk.
A huge shamiana was erected outside the palatial home of the deceased to provide room for the visitors. The shamiana wore a festive look compared to the sobriety that such moments normally demanded. In order to facilitate the staff members and employees, a second shamiana was set-up across the street with slightly lesser ambience. Nevertheless, it did have all the arrangements for food and drinks. A third shamiana was put up to cater the drivers, malis, ayahs, chowkidars and other ‘no-body’ type souls.
Some highly emotional scenes were observed during the course of the events. Two of the grandsons of the deceased, who were themselves nearing the grandfather status, were weeping bitterly. Everybody present was visibly moved by their apparent love and affection that they may have had with the decreased. However, moments later a house servant unveiled the inside story.
The two gentlemen desperately wanted to obtain few ‘powers of attorney’ for a certain prized property that their grandfather had promised to them. With his passing away and without that legal procedure realized, they were crying over the lost opportunity!
Many other family members were soon found weeping for their own unfinished business with the deceased. The mourning continued for several days. After the ‘soyem’, a feast like meal was served which was readily devoured by the huge crowd that was aimlessly extending its presence. A grand condolence meeting was organized in a multi-star hotel in which the ‘great services’ of the deceased were praised unabated. The press corps had been invited to cover the vital event. Colourful photographs and condolence messages continued to adorn the ‘city round-up’ type columns. Visits of few dignitaries and their families were also prominently highlighted by the local media.
This chronicle was not the first of its kind. They happen as routine with the concerned class considering it as their birthright to stage ostentatious extravaganzas to demolish the sanctity of the last rites of their deceased. While nobody in this world knows about the treatment to the souls meted out by the Almighty, rich and poor appear starkly divided during their final journeys. Sadly, this social regimentation which polarizes this already divided society becomes further prominent at the incidence of death of a near and dear one. Few indicators commonly denominate this state of affairs.
Funeral is also a mark of class segregations in the society. Immediately after the death pronouncement, elaborate arrangements are made to receive the mourners. Phone calls and personal contacts are used to inform all and sundry.
By the moment funeral time arrives, a sizable number of people are gathered. Funeral procession is then organized to move towards the graveyard. The movement is obviously regimentalized to align the participation of people according to their status.
The ‘sahib’ type breed moves in their shinning new vehicles while ordinary folks are stuffed in the buses specially hired for the purpose. In order to fill the occasion with true religious fervour, the services of a local maulvi are hired to continue reciting the Holy verses. Usually pupils from a local madressah are also invited to join the ritual. Thus while the ‘bereaved’ are found busy receiving mourners and capitalizing on the occasion, the religious rites continue uninterrupted.
The choice of graveyard is also a matter of great concern. Elite can seldom be buried in graveyards with bones of lesser breed. Thus the already saturated locations, where no further room is available, are re-cycled again and again. After burial, the procession moves back to the residence of the deceased where a sumptuous feast normally awaits them. The grief is dissolved in the irresistible aroma of fresh served foods and culinary sounds.
The next day, a soyem is held with the professional maulvi and his pupils to fulfil the contractual assignment of reciting the Holy verses up till dinner time. Similar function is repeated on the 40th day of the funeral as well.
In contrast to the above elaborate arrangements, the last rites of folks in the lower strata of the society are starkly simple, often incomplete. Whenever any one passes away, the family is struck with a double-edged shock and worry. The grief of the departed soul shakes the household while the worry to mobilize enough funds to decently undertake the funeral remains daunting!
In numerous circumstances, the households fall short of the needed amounts. Since funeral and death are not ‘free’ events, the checklist swells beyond the pocket size of the concerned. Last wrappings for the deceased, land for grave, bus, food, a small tent along with other items raise the cost beyond the capacity. Knowing this handicap, the poor folk start informing people through various means. Using the loudspeakers of the local mosque is the most institutionalized format in this respect.
Expectation is developed that whoever would come to the funeral would also contribute some small funds towards sharing the cost. Since all the friends, relations and neighbours belong to more or less the same strata of income, part of the worry is transferred to their minds. Sometimes people have to pool together small sums to bear the cost. At times the people are made to request the mutawalli (the caretaker) of graveyard to accept the pay back of grave and burial in instalments. Often to curtail cost, people take the corpse to long distances on shoulders.
Posthumous pride is generated through different type of architectural outcomes. Concrete canopies, marble slabs, enclosed graves, mausoleum like structures and at least marble tomb stones are essential in the graves of the affluent. Graveyard layouts are affected by the haphazard pattern of burial which the affluent adopt to satisfy their individual egos. For the poor the grave remains as nameless as the poor himself. It is simply marked by a heap of earth which soon settles with falling rain or any other natural/men made factors.
Every mortal who has come to this finite world is destined to go back empty-handed. If the decorum of the event is made sober and low profile, it can become a commendable trait of our ailing society. Be it the announcement in the media or the actual conduct of burial rites, restraint on extravagance shall not only serve as a positive example for the others to follow. But also a mark of respect for the deceased. If the rich and affluent cannot reduce the already burgeoning griefs of the less privileged, they must not add to them by setting trends impossible to follow.
