IT always brings a smile to one’s countenance when one sees a mother caring for her child. It is this nurturing process that transforms a helpless bundle into an adult capable of existing and contributing to society. Mothers should understandably be proud of their life-long achievement.
But is this presumed state of bliss uniformly shared by all and sundry? I have often come across models of exemplary motherhood who did not pursue a career during those early years. The years went by and the children grew up, and they started forming their own vocational decisions. Then one day, they left the nest to realize their dreams in a distant land. The fathers had jobs to occupy their time, so it was basically the mothers who were suddenly confronted with a bewildering vacuum in their lives.
Many mothers’ eyes suffering from this empty-nest syndrome reflect the emptiness in their lives. They had probably dreamt of playing with their grandchildren regularly rather than looking forward to brief visits. If children migrate from a miniaturized family, it literally snuffs the life out of a mother’s heart. Having a career or one that could be rejuvenated at a later stage might ameliorate their sufferings a little bit.
It should be pointed out that like everything else, the definition of motherhood has also evolved. A woman’s role as a mother is no longer the sole determinant of her overall identity. There are also other callings she has aptitude for. By exploring those spheres, she compliments her individuality and sense of fulfilment. Even children nowadays take pride in having mothers who boast of careers. If children have to be sent abroad for educational purposes, a mother with an income could also help out. Such mothers are able to do more for their children.
Hence, I cannot help but question the tears shed by a mother after she had totally conformed to the philosophy of unconditional sacrifice championed by traditionalists. This is not to claim that had she followed her other goals concurrently, the sadness of children being far away would not gnaw at her psyche.
Human mothers are quite unlike their feline counterparts who are excessively protective of their kittens. Yet, once the kittens grow up, the mother does not give a hoot as to what befalls them. On the contrary, we tend to harbour a life-long concern for our children’s welfare, and keep worrying about them. Thus career-related activities do provide some diversion and help shore up spirits in those bleak moments when thoughts inevitably whirl towards children residing in some foreign domain. Mothers’ lives should definitely extend beyond the horizon of their children. It sounds incredibly difficult yet it is not altogether impossible. It would entail deft juggling of roles and gravity-defying balancing acts on life’s tightrope.
If necessary, reversing family nuclearization to some extent could be considered as an option. In other words, having a helpful grandparent of the children live in and share some of the household responsibilities might create more time for mothers to say, take a few courses at a nearby university. We can all derive inspiration from the fact that there is always a mother somewhere out there who is courageously battling against a heftier set of odds than what we are faced with. The conclusion being that if she can do it, so should we. One should not be caught unprepared to face the future when the time comes to switch gears.
IT always brings a smile to one’s countenance when one sees a mother caring for her child. It is this nurturing process that transforms a helpless bundle into an adult capable of existing and contributing to society. Mothers should understandably be proud of their life-long achievement.
