Uzma Ahmed Khan talks to experts and seeks tips on how to make New Year resolutions that last

It's that time of the year again! Another New Year beckons -- it is a time to reflect, recoup, re-energise, turn over a new leaf (or life) and get those New Year resolutions going. Do New Year resolutions really work? How many of us make these resolutions and more importantly stick to them? Is this really a good/special time to set goals or is most of this New Year business just a lot of hype?

Nobody would argue with the ideology of setting a goal and getting all excited about it -- but the excitement fades away pretty fast. Most goals go out of the window very soon and people don't stick to their resolutions. Why is this so? This scribe talks to some training and management gurus to learn their opinions on this subject.

T.N., involved with training for the last several years, says, “New Year resolutions are made as a last ditch effort to salvage what has already been lost in the past year! Secondly, New Year's Eve is a very over-hyped occurrence and one feels compelled to make some form of contribution to it. Therefore the resolve lasts till probably mid-January and is rediscovered every year around the 20th of December -- almost like an old dusty book!”

Kamran Rizvi, trainer and consultant at Navitus, thinks only commitment leads to firm actions that achieve goals. “One of the reasons why I feel New Year resolutions fail is that they are mere wishes, mistaken for goals. Having a resolution has become a tradition that we follow as a habit without giving it serious thought,” he adds.

Arshi Ahmad-Aziz, trainer and coach at the Institute of Training, has a bit of a philosophical take on this, “Goals are the dreams that life is made of -- it's about making our dreams and hopes for tomorrow more concrete. The problem with goals and New Year resolutions in particular, is that they are sometimes so hard to keep! We set ourselves these lofty hopes and aspirations, and then sometimes find we can't deliver. This can be disheartening, and a deterrent to setting future goals.

“As a professional working with enabling others to set goals, I must admit that I do not always stick to my own goals. However, our inability to meet our goals need not be seen as a failing. The process of setting goals is often in itself a reward as it makes you more self aware; through setting goals you are able to identify your needs and wants. If you set goals, you are more likely to meet them than if you do not.

“Goals are like the stars -- we plot our course by them, but rarely reach them. So even if we do not in totality meet our goals, the journey we set off on to do so is rewarding in itself.”

These experts have suggested some tips for people who are planning on setting some goals for 2009

Write it down and revisit it often

The experts unanimously vote in favour of writing down your goals. “A goal not written is a goli,” says Kamran Rizvi. “Therefore, if you are seriously keen to make your dreams a reality, write them down and review them frequently. Make sure your dreams at least include your personal development, family, community and organisation.
“Follow this by converting your dreams into a set of goals and plans and into tasks and activities. Plot these on your calendar and share them with those who are part of your plans. Remember, a goal is simply a dream, but with a deadline! Goal and commitment are two words, in the absence of which, everything else in life, turns to naught! I set goals in areas that I believe are important for me. In fact, anyone who is serious about success will have written goals and plans to achieve them. A goal not set is not achieved. A fulfilling life comes from having a direction that is determined and energised by a clear sense of purpose.”

 T.N. also recommends, “Set goals today and revisit them everyday -- don't wait for the end of the year. Keeping diaries is very helpful. That way one can revisit one's resolves/goals and stay on track. What works for me is to constantly reflect on my life and actions, every day, every moment, rather than wait till the end of the year. Life's too short we may not live to see another day!”

Aziz again enforces the writing part and elaborates it further, “There are a few 'rules' that I feel work during setting goals. Writing them down helps to clarify them, making them easier to understand and therefore easier to put into action. Place your written goals in a spot where you will see them every day. Right beside your bed is a good place, so when you wake up they are the first thing you read. This reinforces the goal each time you read it, making your mind accustomed to the idea of the goal.

Seek support

Aziz states, “Talk about your goals -- share them with others. This not only prepares them for the changes that are going to happen, but also enables them to be supportive in your endeavours.”

This statement is further reinforced by Rubina Jamal, CEO of Insolito Associates, a Management Consultancy Firm, “Goals need the support of the family, as at times individual resolutions are difficult, and each person should know what their role is.”

She likens the family to the organisation, “Just like in an organisation, you need to have a strategy and a vision -- at the end of the year review what went right and what went wrong and build on your strengths. Focus on change, not blame.”

Use baby steps

“Break down your goal into baby steps, for instance, losing twenty pounds is a difficult target indeed, but reducing two pounds each month is an attainable goal,” says Aziz.

Shireen Naqvi, trainer at Navitus hits hard on this whole New Year Resolution business and says she has a simple philosophy -- do it every day. “It's not a matter of looking good in other people's eyes but rather your own, for you can fool others but you can not con yourself. And deep down, the less we think of ourselves, the harder it hits on our individual integrity. It's a matter of implosion -- a kind of self-destructive mechanism and that equals to a pitiful life.”
All of the above discussion is nothing new; it is just pure common sense with oodles of self-discipline thrown in. Of course, you need to 'own' your goal and make sure it's yours and not somebody else's version of what you should accomplish in life.

Andrew Mathews also warns, “Whenever we decide to change, we meet resistance. We are always challenged to see if we are serious.” As soon as you go on a diet, you may be inundated with dinner invitations, weddings, anniversaries, etc. His advice is simply to 'be prepared'. You will be tested!

Hence, forge ahead, review and revisit and keep on trying till you get to the top.... and along with all the above advice, remember to enjoy the journey. Happy New Year!!!