Birthday jokes

Published July 21, 2012

Q: What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln and Christopher Columbus all have in common?

A: They were all born on holidays.

*****

Q: What goes up and never comes down?

A: Your age!

*****

One day a king sat outside his palace in a gloomy mood. The king saw a beggar passing by and he asked the beggar if he wanted some bread. He gratefully accepted it.

A: “Don’t birthdays burn you up?”

*****

Q: “Were any famous men born on your birthday?”

A: “No, only little babies.”

*****

Q: What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?

A: Angel food cake, of course!

*****

Q: What has wings, a long tail and wears a bow?

A: A birthday pheasant!

*****

Q: Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake?

A: Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom!

*****

Q: What was the average age of a cave man?

A: Stone Age!

*****

Q: Why couldn’t prehistoric man send birthday cards?

A: The stamps kept falling off the rocks!

*****

Q: Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock?

A: Because it was marble cake!

*****

 Q: What party game do rabbits like to play?

A: Musical hares!

*****

Q: What does a cat like to eat on his birthday?

A: Mice cream and cake!

*****

Patient: “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.”

Doctor: “Next time, take off the candles.”

*****

I like birthdays, but I think too many can kill you.

*****

Q: Where do you find a birthday present for a cat?

A: In a cat-alogue!

*****

Q: What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?

A: Thanks. I’ll never part with it!

*****

Q: Why are birthday’s good for you?

A: Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

*****

Q: What did the ice cream say to the unhappy birthday cake?

A: “What’s eating you?”

*****

Q: What is a meaning of a true friend?

A: One who remembers your birthday but not your age!— Compiled by The Surfer

Opinion

Editorial

X post facto
Updated 19 Apr, 2024

X post facto

Our decision-makers should realise the harm they are causing.
Insufficient inquiry
19 Apr, 2024

Insufficient inquiry

UNLESS the state is honest about the mistakes its functionaries have made, we will be doomed to repeat our follies....
Melting glaciers
19 Apr, 2024

Melting glaciers

AFTER several rain-related deaths in KP in recent days, the Provincial Disaster Management Authority has sprung into...
IMF’s projections
Updated 18 Apr, 2024

IMF’s projections

The problems are well-known and the country is aware of what is needed to stabilise the economy; the challenge is follow-through and implementation.
Hepatitis crisis
18 Apr, 2024

Hepatitis crisis

THE sheer scale of the crisis is staggering. A new WHO report flags Pakistan as the country with the highest number...
Never-ending suffering
18 Apr, 2024

Never-ending suffering

OVER the weekend, the world witnessed an intense spectacle when Iran launched its drone-and-missile barrage against...