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I finally watched Kaaf Kangana and instantly wished I hadn't

I finally watched Kaaf Kangana and instantly wished I hadn't

A baffling, babbling tale set against the backdrop of regional tension.
Updated 15 Nov, 2019

Where do we begin? Perhaps with the statement that sitting through the entire duration of Kaaf Kangana (KK) is the greatest feat of dedication to her craft this writer has ever accomplished.

Written and directed by Khalil ur Rehman Qamar and bank-rolled by ISPR, KK is Pakistan’s answer to Bollywood’s jingoistic movies, a plethora of which we have been subjected to over the years.

We understand the need to represent Pakistan in a better light globally, we agree that cinema is a fantastic format to tackle propaganda against the state and to project Pakistani culture but is KK really the best we have to offer?

The story, though hard to piece together from the trailers, is simple enough in essence. Ali Mustafa, embodied by Sami Khan is a humble but intelligent Lahori boy, from the heart of the old city, Bhatti Gate.

He encounters Kangana Rathore (Eeshal Fayyaz), an Indian girl with a penchant for always being decked to the nines in the final round of a SAARC quiz competition, where he loses to her over a controversial (read: Kashmir related) question. Kangana wins a trip to Lahore as her prize and sets into motion events that had been building up since partition.

With a screen time of 2 hours and 37 minutes, KK is a celebration of stereotypes, dialogues that seemed to be written in the early 90’s and acting that can only be described as inspired by Ekta Kapoor’s over the top soaps for Star Plus.

I wish the acting was the movie's redeeming quality. Spoiler alert: it wasn't.
I wish the acting was the movie's redeeming quality. Spoiler alert: it wasn't.

While the crux of the plot, lifted by KRQ from a real life story about Kaneez Fatima, revolves around a girl who was stopped at the border during Partition and was unable to join her love in Pakistan and the movie has an overt peace message, the execution of it all leaves much to be desired.

Coming to the acting essayed by the countless characters that crop up every now and then, one can’t entirely decide who is at fault for the sensationalised tone that renders each one an exaggerated caricature of what they might be in the real, modern world.


With a screen time of 2 hours and 37 minutes, KK is a celebration of stereotypes, dialogues that seemed to be written in the early 90’s and acting that can only be described as inspired by Ekta Kapoor’s over the top soaps for Star Plus.


Can the writer/director, in this case both accolades belong to KRQ, be taken to task for Fizza Ali’s hysterical dialogue delivery in every scene? Was Sami Khan meant to transition without warning from a soft spoken man to vein popping maniac?

KRQ also takes the opportunity for launch the career of his son Abi Khan as an actor. Abi plays the role of Tony, a local goon in love with Ayesha Omar, who is obviously in love with Sami Khan’s character. If the story doesn’t possess a love triangle is it even a legitimate South Asian romance?

Ayesha Omar provides some relief during her brief time on screen.
Ayesha Omar provides some relief during her brief time on screen.

Omar’s character, though brief in its screen-time provides some relief, both aesthetically compared to odious styling featured in the rest of the film and in terms of acting and dialogue. Her natural effervescence shines through bringing some respite to sore eyes.

Much has already been spoken about Neelum Muneer’s “item” song in movie. Honestly, the song adds nothing except extra minutes to a film that is already in dire need of sharper editing and Muneer doesn’t exactly bust out scandalous moves; she emotes with her eyes and facial expressions, trying to make sense of the dialogues of the song.

It is perhaps the least offensive number in the whole movie though the need for full song and dance sequences in 2019 can be questioned. If they add nothing of value to the plotline, what purpose do they serve? On a gourmet plate of food, serving inedible items even for aesthetic purposes is considered to be malpractice, can the same standard be applied to films?

My face while watching KK.
My face while watching KK.

This brings us back to the heart of the matter and the man at the center of the production, KRQ.

Though KRQ generated waves before and around the time of KK’s release with some rather strange and misogynistic interviews, this writer believes in holding a movie up on its own merit and chose to disengage with his personal discourse. Even by that standard, the film fails to deliver.


We understand the need to represent Pakistan in a better light globally, we agree that cinema is a fantastic format to tackle propaganda against the state and to project Pakistani culture but is KK really the best we have to offer?


Known for his incredibly crafted dialogues for some of Pakistani TV’s best loved drama serials, KRQ pens conversations that left one wondering, “who talks like that?”

Do people in real life actually go about saying “Is haveli par pyaar ka shraap hai,” even in India? KRQ is unable to secure a willing suspension of disbelief in his audience and the whole series of events have an unrealistic tint to them.

As you, the astute reader, have gathered by now, this is not a review that will praise the quintessential masala film, especially given how poorly the entire project is executed. Maybe KRQ bit off more than he could chew with his debut as director.

Or maybe, he just needs better stories and human understanding before embarking on such ambitious projects.

Verdict? Watch at the cost of your precious brain cells.

Comments

Khurram Abrar Nov 15, 2019 11:41am
A beautiful movie showing the harsh reality and the inevitable truth. A must watch.
Recommend (0)
Ali Nov 15, 2019 11:51am
Khalil ur Reham qamar is name of stereotype and hypocrisy and misogyny. It making sense after his interview published on these same pages. He is doomed sooner or later
Recommend (0)
Killer Nov 15, 2019 12:12pm
Another failure by Pakistani anti propaganda machine. How much money did you spend making this flop show?
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Sameer Nov 15, 2019 12:23pm
o dear. the cringe!!!
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Kris Nov 15, 2019 12:27pm
Pakistani tax dollars at work?
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conspiracy_theory Nov 15, 2019 01:49pm
What else can we expect from ISPR?
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Abdul Aziz Nov 15, 2019 01:50pm
Rare moment where everyone in Pak will agree. If ISPR is going to use tax payer money to fight propaganda then at least make proper, good quality movies that people will actually bother to see.
Recommend (0)
Nett Nov 15, 2019 02:16pm
Do people in real life actually go about saying “Is haveli par pyaar ka shraap hai,” even in India? No.
Recommend (0)
Fatima Nov 15, 2019 03:51pm
Over the last few years, Pakistani cinema has excelled in production values. This film particularly lacks that! I desperately want to support Pakistani movies, but this was was absolute pain. The direction, acting, wardrobe and even makeup was not up to the mark. Even the songs were not that catchy. Felt like a movie from early 90’s( a certain hot at that point and time). If only KRQ would have given the script to Nadeem Baig or any professional director, they could have carved it into a gem !
Recommend (0)
Rebirth Nov 15, 2019 04:00pm
When it comes to similar Indian movies, how does it fare in comparison? That would be the best metric to judge it by. But that wasn't the criteria used in the article.
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ahmad Nov 15, 2019 04:59pm
" Do people in real life actually go about saying" Are you unaware of even the basic elements of cinema? ever heard about 'dramatic effect' ?
Recommend (0)
Daskalos Nov 15, 2019 06:50pm
Thanks for a fine, intelligent review. A total flop movie with no redeeming features. I often wonder what the ISPR has to do with producing such movies and TV shows etc that are nothing but bilge?
Recommend (0)
Salman Nov 15, 2019 10:14pm
Note to all such future projects: Mindless anti-Pakistan venom sells in India. Mindless anti-India venom does NOT sell in Pakistan.
Recommend (0)
rk Nov 15, 2019 10:26pm
I like this movie
Recommend (0)
Vijay B. Nov 16, 2019 12:46am
"Verdict? Watch at the cost of your precious brain cells. " Just could not suppress my laughter on that last line.
Recommend (0)
N abidai Nov 16, 2019 01:51am
The ego's are very big. A good writer, in this film made a very dated,bad film. Hope other big ego's of specifically ptv era geniuses must learn that people now are aware of films,dramas,and music from all over the world ! The artists of today are educated and the audiences as,well!
Recommend (0)
Abdullah Nov 16, 2019 12:06pm
KRQ's mind is still stuck in early 90s, and it seems like he can't get over it, and its not his fault if he grew in a time when writing cheesy dialouges and emotional stories was a norm. It's the mistake of producers that they are spending their money on a writer like him who is not suited for writing a film, nor even a tv drama in 2019 (if you ask my opinion). He should immediately quit the film industry and writing, as our industry is hardly trying to recover, last thing is to have such movies who would further destroy it. Punjab Nahi Jaungi was enough to open the eyes of people but its like we never learn lessons.
Recommend (0)
Waqar Nov 18, 2019 01:34pm
In KRQ words is do tikkay ki movie k lye aap ny mera 50million ka time zaya kardya.
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